[ickydog2006]

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR


I was doing so good. It seemed like everything was finally getting straightened out. Now iI have a stupid cold......yeah I know it seems like it isn't a big deal. It feels like someone is sqeezing my lungs so i can't breathe but the worst part is it feel like my heart is being ripped open. It is the same physical pain that I felt last month from quitting cutting. It hurts so bad. It is completely emotinally straining and I feel like everything, all the thoughts and feelings from last month are rushing back. I'm scared that it will stay with me. Why can't this pain just leave me alone? It's engulfing my mind. I'm searching for an escape and everything is black except for a red slit of a hole that I could fit through but it will be painful. You all know what I'm talking about. It's the only escape i can see. I'm at school with no blade...which is a really good thing... but it seems like such an easy escape. I HATE THIS SO FREAKING MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[hereiam]

You really wanna take the easy way out and cut? Hm. Well, I guess you could, but imagine the pain of letting yourself down after not cutting for over a month. That's all I'm saying.

And good! Come here, vent, be pissed and mad and angry! Yell, cry, scream, use endless amounts of exlamation points. You're getting out your emotions in a healthy way...for that, you should be proud of yourself, cause we're definitely proud of you.

You can do it, Ickydog!!!! You can!! Hang on, Snoopy!
I'm sorry you have a cold. When you get home boil some hot water put it in a bowl and inhale the steam w/ a towel draped over your head. It works. Put some tea in there too. Hey, you'll clear out your lungs AND get a facial at the same time!!!
You're doing SSSSOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO good. Don't let yourself down. (((((((((((((Ickydog))))))))))))))

[ickydog2006]

Thanx guys
It means a lot to me to be able to come here and vent

[bipolar_bear]

Don't give up Ickydog. You can do it. I am sorry you are not feeling well and thats impacting how you are feeling about yourself. I wishI could take away all your pain but all I can offer you is that I am here should you need someone to talk to. PM me anytime. Take care of yourself. Be safe.

[dayzee9]

((((((((((((Hey Icky!!)))))))))))

You have been doing entirely too good to give up now!

I know colds are a drag & they may get you so irritated, you might be tempted.....BUT, that's when you come here & You know there will always be someone here 24/7, we all run on different clocks,,,,,,,,and you ALWAYS PM me!

I went to see the 2nd neurosurgeon who said they can get the whole tumor out BUT they are going to have to shave almost the entire right front of my head......christ, I heard that & when I got home, I prayed for a blade!!! I cannot deal w/ this! But both surgeons were giving the infamous "look" at my wrists & arms. I'm sure the rest of you know that one!!!

Icky, let's make a deal.....I won't cave if you don't....
and furthermore, I think...

DAYZEE9

[ickydog2006]

Thanks Dayzee