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#1
Nov 21, 2010, 04:18 AM
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Need I say more. I'm scared of the SI taking control. So I try and do good things. but they aren't helping right now. I'm on the edge of control. I keep seeing more and more ways that I could SI. It's not good, I can't take it much longer. but maybe sleep will hlep. I hope it does. It's the last thing I have left... before I do something really bad. I've been here before. and I think I can get past this. I think...
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#2
Nov 21, 2010, 09:36 AM
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I am sorry you are feeling this way. When you get the urge to SI, have you tried pinching yourself maybe? I am not sure in what form you SI; I tend to punch walls and doors to hurt my hands. I have tried the pinching method and it has worked for me.
__________________
Be who you are and say what you feel... Because those who matter.. Don’t mind... And those who mind.. Don’t matter." (Dr. Seuss) 
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#3
Nov 21, 2010, 03:02 PM
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How are you doing now Puzzclar?
__________________
Don't let your problems or the world make you feel small. Stretch your arms out over your head. Take a deep breathe. Tell yourself that you are big. You are big, not small. You always have space, you are not trapped........ I'm an ISFJ |
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#4
Nov 21, 2010, 06:30 PM
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I did end up giving in but I've seen more images, and I just don't know what to do. I'm almost to the point that I need to give in.... and I know that's not what I need to do. but..... one good thing, I don't have the objects that the images use. except for water...I don't do the normal thing of cutting but its nothing that will led to infection or anything serious.... but I almost want more then what I have been doing, just to see if the images will go away. Sleep didn't help. and the images are at full strenght. more than I've experenced. I don't think that decrease one med was a good idea... I"m introuble.
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#5
Nov 22, 2010, 02:57 AM
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Can you call your pdoc about this?
__________________
Don't let your problems or the world make you feel small. Stretch your arms out over your head. Take a deep breathe. Tell yourself that you are big. You are big, not small. You always have space, you are not trapped........ I'm an ISFJ |
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#6
Nov 23, 2010, 08:50 PM
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I could, but then for me it means that I really have to be on a higher dose, and that's the last thing I want. But I haven't been myself, what so ever. I've gotten really down.... and I have looked at things that I should not look at... but one thing saved me from buying something to really do the job. As of right now, the si that I have been doing is not of to much harm to me... it's just uncomfortable. and it's not enough. I've been searching for more........ I'm in trouble.... and I do know this.... there is more stress on me... more than in a while now.... stress triggers Psycotic break downs..... and stress always wins. It's almost like I can't win..... because..... and I don't even know why?!
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#7
Nov 24, 2010, 02:45 AM
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So the choice is between a higher dose or chaos?? Sometimes you have to choose the lesser of 2 evils instead of the perfect choice.
What about therapy? Please continue to keep us posted.
__________________
Don't let your problems or the world make you feel small. Stretch your arms out over your head. Take a deep breathe. Tell yourself that you are big. You are big, not small. You always have space, you are not trapped........ I'm an ISFJ |
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#8
Nov 24, 2010, 05:01 PM
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Therapy will happen in the new year. I can't find one where I am right now. So I will have to wait until I get into a more perminate positon, where I wont be moving again in a month.
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 Sannah
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