Home Menu

Menu


Reply
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old Dec 27, 2010, 05:31 PM
lovefew-fearnone's Avatar
lovefew-fearnone lovefew-fearnone is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Jan 2010
Location: Texas
Posts: 214
I crashed. I caved. my legs are covered with cuts and with her name.
I am not sure what got ahold of me but i know the shorts i was wearing last night are trash. covered in blood.
I am so sorry to everyone who i have just let down. I hope Yall can forgive me. My therapist was right I am scared to lose but its even worse when i didn't see it coming and i wake up and shes gone. I fought for her and i can't get her back.
She stopped me from cutting last time and now I don't see a reason not to.
I really have no idea what I'm doing I'm just so lost and the light at the end of the tunnel was me moving back to what I have always known.
__________________
------------------------------------------------
Watch All, Love Few, Fear None


On the dark side....

Jealous and resentful
Compulsive and obsessive
Secretive and obstinate



Formally known as enditnow92

advertisement
  #2  
Old Dec 27, 2010, 06:56 PM
silver_moon's Avatar
silver_moon silver_moon is offline
Magnate
 
Member Since: Jan 2008
Location: Yorkshire, UK
Posts: 2,065
You've not let anyone down. Sometimes we do crash, that's a fact and it's ok if we still keep trying.
I don't know about your history and don't quite know what to say to help, but I can't walk away after reading your post. When do you next see your therapist, perhaps they can offer some support.

Please take care and if you need to speak to anyone (just chat... to keep your mind of things/her for a little while) feel free to message me
__________________
Makes me that much stronger
Makes me work a little bit harder
Makes me that much wiser
So thanks for making me a fighter
  #3  
Old Dec 27, 2010, 07:04 PM
Christina86's Avatar
Christina86 Christina86 is offline
Legendary
 
Member Since: Feb 2006
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 19,686
My only advice is that depending on others to prevent you from cutting will always wind up letting you down. Really, I learned that the hard way - stopped SI because of a friend, who then left. Then I relapsed. It only really works to quit or stop if you quit for yourself and find tools to help you that you can do by yourself.

I'm sorry. If your cuts need to be looked at, please go to a doctor.
__________________
emergency
Thanks for this!
Sannah
  #4  
Old Dec 27, 2010, 07:43 PM
lovefew-fearnone's Avatar
lovefew-fearnone lovefew-fearnone is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Jan 2010
Location: Texas
Posts: 214
thanks everyone... my t has been no help to me whatsoever.... none of them have done anything more than make it worse. I don't know if they need to be looked at but I'm trying to stop and its harder this time than its ever been. I can't give up but I'm so close....
thanks for the replies
__________________
------------------------------------------------
Watch All, Love Few, Fear None


On the dark side....

Jealous and resentful
Compulsive and obsessive
Secretive and obstinate



Formally known as enditnow92
  #5  
Old Dec 27, 2010, 08:07 PM
Sannah's Avatar
Sannah Sannah is offline
Legendary
 
Member Since: Jul 2008
Posts: 19,179
LFFN, it is up to you to use your resources to help yourself.
__________________
Don't let your problems or the world make you feel small. Stretch your arms out over your head. Take a deep breathe. Tell yourself that you are big. You are big, not small. You always have space, you are not trapped........

I'm an ISFJ
  #6  
Old Dec 27, 2010, 09:28 PM
Mike_J's Avatar
Mike_J Mike_J is offline
Infamous Vampire Duck
Community Liaison
 
Member Since: Dec 2009
Location: Mid West
Posts: 12,742
The right therapist can make all the diferance. I know mine has saved my life more than once. Keep looking for a therapist that you can connect with, therapy is a painful process but in the long run it's worth it.
__________________
“If we could change ourselves, the tendencies in the world would also change. As a man changes his own nature, so does the attitude of the world change towards him. ... We need not wait to see what others do.” Gandhi
  #7  
Old Dec 27, 2010, 09:41 PM
Omers's Avatar
Omers Omers is offline
Grand Magnate
 
Member Since: Nov 2010
Location: Crimson cattery
Posts: 3,512
A lot of T's are not good with SI... keep looking... they are out there! Please let us support you in any way we can. First and formost are they bad enough that you need to go to the ER or get help right away? if there is even a hint of question go get them looked at. This may be a stupid question and my intent is not to offend or insult but... do you know at least basic first aide? Like beyond what mom did when you were a kid but not what a Dr would know either. It may be beneficial to take a basic first aide course there are a ton out there. At least enough to know how to manage the injuries until you can get to a Dr? Right now what is done is done and needs to be treated to make sure it heals propperly and does not get worse. Also do you have the propper first aide stuff to take care of it?
I know that it is easier said than done but forgive yourself and start anew... stewing over what is already done would only create more stress and you don't need that now. Focus on the road ahead, self care, wound care and how to keep yourself safe until you can get the help you need and want.
Usual disclaimer... I am just opinionated... I am not a Dr or a T... my opinion is only that... an outside, observers opinion.
__________________
There’s been many a crooked path
that has landed me here
Tired, broken and wearing rags
Wild eyed with fear
-Blackmoores Night
  #8  
Old Dec 27, 2010, 11:49 PM
lovefew-fearnone's Avatar
lovefew-fearnone lovefew-fearnone is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Jan 2010
Location: Texas
Posts: 214
I'm sorry everyone. It just got alot worse.... I am such a failure.....
__________________
------------------------------------------------
Watch All, Love Few, Fear None


On the dark side....

Jealous and resentful
Compulsive and obsessive
Secretive and obstinate



Formally known as enditnow92
  #9  
Old Dec 28, 2010, 02:16 AM
KeepHoldingOn's Avatar
KeepHoldingOn KeepHoldingOn is offline
Grand Poohbah
 
Member Since: Jan 2010
Posts: 1,519
You are not a failure in my eyes. You were sidetracked and just need guidance in order to get back where you were. Keep working on finding new strategies to cope. I wish you all the best! If you ever need anyone to talk to I’m here for you.

-Liz
Thanks for this!
lovefew-fearnone
  #10  
Old Dec 28, 2010, 08:09 PM
Sannah's Avatar
Sannah Sannah is offline
Legendary
 
Member Since: Jul 2008
Posts: 19,179
Quote:
Originally Posted by lovefew-fearnone View Post
I'm sorry everyone. It just got alot worse.... I am such a failure.....
LFFN, what do you need to do to help yourself? Can you call your therapist?
__________________
Don't let your problems or the world make you feel small. Stretch your arms out over your head. Take a deep breathe. Tell yourself that you are big. You are big, not small. You always have space, you are not trapped........

I'm an ISFJ
  #11  
Old Jan 07, 2011, 01:01 AM
allieautopsy's Avatar
allieautopsy allieautopsy is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Feb 2010
Location: california
Posts: 44
im not gone...
__________________
THeyCallMeAllieAutopsy(:
Reply
Views: 691

attentionThis is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.




All times are GMT -5. The time now is 01:56 PM.
Powered by vBulletin® — Copyright © 2000 - 2025, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.




 

My Support Forums

My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.

 

Helplines and Lifelines

The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider.

Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here.