[backandforth]

I know some people stop to si eventually, but if you don't go for therapy for it or something else, can you stop on your own?? I go from bad to good to worse to a little si.... it just never stops though. And I'm afraid b/c I've found ways that one, make the si less visible, and two not as permanent so to say, so I'm more likely to do it....... why would anyone do this?????? noone knows, I've done it since so many years... I wonder how I even started..... do you think this will ever go away??? when will "enough be enough"?

[bipolar_bear]

Welcome to psych central backandforth.

I am sure that it is possible to stop si on your own. However, normally there are underlying issues that if left unaddressed this negative coping mechanism will return when you become distressed. You may find it beneficial to find a therapist to help you find positive coping skills and address whatever may be attributing to your si. Good luck and be safe.

I have been SI'ing since I was at least 10-13 years old so I know for me the urge is always going to be there. I can either give in to it or I can fight it by usnig other outlets like calling a friend, calling my therapist, Talking in therapy sessions about it, journalling craft projects that take alot of energy and time to do, clean the house, take a bath, listen to music, read a book, take a walk.... my list of what to do when the urge hits goes on.

The actual work on stopping SI comes from the person who is doing it so yea stopping without therapy is possible if the person knows why they do it and sets themselves up a plan on other non SI outlets that they WILL actively do when the urge hits.

I don't discuss my SI with my present therapist. She knows I do it and that I know that she has grounds for involluntary commitment to a mental health unit if she sees fresh evidence of SI/suicidal behavior within the past 24 hours. because I will NOT go into another mental health unit, I will NOT put her into that position of having to hospitalize me by dicussing or displaying my SI "evidence". All she needs to know is that I do have an emergency to do list for when the urge hits and I am actively working on it. She accepts this given my reason for not being hospitalized and has asked that I tell her when the urge is there, not for hospitalization reason but so that we can up the amount of sessions to take care of it or other things until the urge passes. She doesn't need to know if I did anything she just wanted to offer me another outlet if needed and I agreed with her. I am open to any and all alternative outlets.

Don't be too hard on yourself bouncing back and forth on this is part of the healing process. Its kind of like an adiction. When a person stops drinking or drugs they have times when they slip back into it until they have enogh coping tools to resist the urges. Enough will be enough when you have other coping tools and prefer to use those over SI'ing. Take care

[backandforth]

thans for the replies.... I wish I could actually believe that this will stop eventually but I have my doubts- and I know I could actively try to stop but I don't think I can on my own, not forever at least. but I do agree that I guess it is possible, it's just that I don't really see the point, as much as I hate that it's part of my life, it's something I can do, something that is mine and I have control over,... and the way I feel at those moments, there is no way out....

why would someone have to involvuntarly committ you though myself? you're not trying to committ suicide, that's not what si is.....

I know Im not trying to kill myself by cutting. But United State law doesn't see it as simple as that. Basically its illegal in the United states to be a danger to yourself or others. But they make no distictions of breaking it down into situations. that law covers homicide, suicide, self harm, abuse, and so on.

If a person is harming themselves and or others in any way they can be arrested and or committed into a mental health unit for treatment. For involluntary committment the person is remanded to the MHU at the very least for 72 hours and it can be up to 14 days for an evaluation an medication stabilization then released or a longewr term facility is found.

Therapy agencys must go according to the laws and also follow state and federal mental health codes in order to obtain an agency license. The same for therapists obtaining their individual certification and licensing.

The mental health field considers cutting to be dangerious and potentially life threatening because the person can accidentally cut an artery and die within seconds (unless they have nursing biology/physiology background cutters don't know each and every artery and vein) on top of that at the moment of cutting the cutter is usually reacting in the heat of emotions instead of logic of how deep they cut. It usually isn't until after the cutter has gotter that release andis thinking straight that the look to see what damage they caused to see if they need to go for stitches.

So an agency before they even open the door to clients set down their guidelines for how they plan to treat clients when they find out someone is an abuser, suicidal or a self injurer. Most agencys guideline protocals are that these clients are to be refered for inpatient care. Not only for the safety of the client doing these things but for the other clients as well. for example someone went into the agencys bathroom and purposely cut. and in the heat of the moment forgets to clean up every drop of blood. No one knows if that cutter had AIDS and so on.

Anytime I enter therapy with a new agency I find out what their guidelines are for suicide and self harm. My agency does follow the protocal of hospitalization if they know of someone actively suicidal or self harming behaviors. My therapists individual views on it is if there is another way she will dicuss other opions but because she works for an agency that has set guidelines she doesn't really have a choice if its in that 24 hour mental health code window so Im not going to put her into that position of her personal views conflicting with the mental health codes and guidelines set down by the law and agency.

Considering I have been hospitalized once voluntarily and 3 thimes involluntarily I am more than happy to not show and recent "evidence" of my self harm situations.

[ickydog2006]

Well. I have quit for almost 3 months. Therapy didn't really help with the cutting part but with a lot of underlying factors.

I can tell you one thing. The urges arn't just going to stop. Get rid of all underlying causes and they won't stop. All you can do is fight it. Yeah it is hard. The first month was hell for me. But it got better. I still have cravings though...and yeah sometimes they get bad. The other day I was flipping out and had to destract myself....butI'm at least learning to do it productively. I got an 8 page report done, worked on Christmas projects, watched some TV, wrote poetry. ANd despite doing things that were usually fun like TV, it wasn't fun. I had to keep my gaurd up and not give up.

It is worth it to quit. But it isn't going to be easy. If you keep waiting for 'enough to be enough' I can tell you right now it is a waist of your time. That time is never going to come. All you can do is keep your gaurd up, know what triggers you, and fight the feeling with all you have.

Good Luck...you can do it
((((((((((((((Backandforth))))))))))))))))))

[hereiam]

i havent cut in 5 months but the urges still don't go away. im in the same position as you, wondering if therapy is the right thing for me or not as far as my SI'ing goes. my best advice is to just stop. you have to cause there is no 'right time' to stop and ween yourself off of it - you just gotta do it.

good luck

eta: i dont know why everyone says it doesnt get easier, because it does. instead of thinking about it daily you'll start thinking about it every other day, then instead of every other day every few days. not saying that in times of stress your mind doesnt immediately go to that thought of SI, but that it will get easier with time and getting into the habit of doing other things that arent SI.

[backandforth]

I think stopping si can get easier w/ time but it takes a lot of committment and work... but it's so easy to slip out even though this doesn't mean 'it was all for nothing'. my problem is that I have other issues (ie. ed's) that intensify the si or bring it about and si is a way to escape all of that, to feel 'legitimate' pain..... I know any improvement is a step in the right direction and as I said (or maybe I didn't) I do si much less now but the scary thing is I am more than willing to use it when I 'have to'.... you know? thanks though for all the encouragement.

[Lexicon78]

I hope you can stop it on your own with lots of determination. I myself have been a cutter for the last 13 years or so. I'll be ok for about a week or so, but after 2 weeks of not cutting I go back to it again...I go in cycles of 2 weeks. I'm hoping that someday I can also stop cutting. I wish you the best of luck.