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#1
Dec 23, 2005, 06:30 PM
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im back home, where i used to cut a lot. it seems like being around all these familiar places really brings thoughts back and now im getting those urges again. at university, i dont have the urges as much unless i feel like i HAVE to, because ive never cut at university. but here...its like i can be having a great day and i still want to.
anyone else experience this? its hard.
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"Next, don't go to Europe to 'find yourself.' Who told you you were over there anyway?" -The Colbert Report on 'Things Not To Do After Graduating College' |
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#2
Dec 23, 2005, 08:19 PM
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yes!!!!! ((((heriam))) you're not alone in feeling that way.... I think the environment, the people around you, and the circumstances can have a huge impact on things like si or an ed or depression.... especially if it brings back bad memories... and sometimes you just feel like it was normal within a certain environment, so it almost feels weird not to cut. the only thing I can say is that maybe knowing that you CAN go without si if you're in the "right" environment might help you get through this.... it'll only be for a while that you're back anyways, right? for the holidays? holidays sure can be hell to deal w/.... in so many ways. do you have any support at home? family or old friends? maybe staying busy will help some, so getting into the "christmas spirit" (whatever that means) and prepping for christmas, just to be distracted..... sorry that it's so hard
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 "Courage consists in holding on just one moment longer." Albert Payson Terhune |
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#3
Dec 24, 2005, 10:03 AM
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Yeah, I think that's why getting out of that environment can be such a help. Hang in there. Are you home on break? Hopefully you'll be back at school again soon.
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#4
Dec 24, 2005, 12:53 PM
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backandfourth - Im glad im not the only one who feels this way! You're completely right about it feeling weird NOT to verses feeling weird TO do it. It's like when I was here, around these same people doing these same things, I delt by cutting. Now...I don't. It's just plain weird.
JustBen - I am home on break, and I should be back to school soon. Thanks. You're right backandfourth its like when we put ourselves back in that environment its like our brain goes back to the way it used to think in that same environment. I smoke here, and I never smoke at university. I would cut here, but I refrain from cutting at university. It's all kinda weird. Thanks everyone for the support and replies!
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"Next, don't go to Europe to 'find yourself.' Who told you you were over there anyway?" -The Colbert Report on 'Things Not To Do After Graduating College' |
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#5
Dec 24, 2005, 05:05 PM
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I'm sorry you're so confused. Try to keep coping. I will too. *Fingers crossed*
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...she's a difficult girl...
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