[greyclouds]

I don't know where to of posted this but I guess as I feel very frustrated and frustration leads to my si, I guessed I would post it here.
I finding things really hard, I can't talk to my family and friends as they worry to much, and a lot of the time no matter how many times I send them links, etc to try and explain what's going on how I feel they don't seem to get it.

Not only am I fighting a battle against myself I feel I have to try and convince people of the way I'm feeling.

I come on here and to be honest I think this is prob just as bad, go in to support chat and there no one in there supporting, only talking about puppies and talking in there little groups.

Im just fed up with no one listening no one to talk to.

I just so frustrated, I often feel like I'm invisible and if it want for my children the purpose of being here would be none.

[RatherDream]

I understand how you feel. I get the back burner feeling all the time and it makes me angry as I feel that I am always the after thought to everyone when I visibly have a problem. It isn't until I snap that they decide to confront me about it and then usually they become rude because I was (which makes me feel even more terrible).

It more so happens with my friends than my family as they have their separate problems as well and I am seen as the supportive one to them all. Except it seems no one turns around and lets me rant or tries to comfort me when I am down and sometimes I end up doubting my relationships. What's even worse is that I know they understand and they just continue to avoid me as if the problem will slowly fix itself and they can talk to me again when I look like I am better.

I am sorry to hear no one is reaching out or even trying to understand your problems. When we are upset, it truly seems like the world and all its people are against us. And sometimes they are. Is there anything you wish to discuss or get off your chest?

[greyclouds]

I'm sorry you feel like this too, thanks for reading and posting.
I don't know there alway loads I want to say, but I never really know how I'm feeling to talk about it as such,
And when I do it gets thrown back in my face.
It makes me want to hurt myself,
Just want to have a friend in the same place ad me i guess

[RatherDream]

Sort of the "I know what I want to say, but don't know how to say it" feeling? It can be difficult if your problems haven't been properly discussed with others before or no one has tried to help you with them. You fail to recognize the source of the problem because you're just focusing on the head that is visible and you are trying to get everyone to see. It still happens with me with certain problems I have. Trying to talk about them, especially with a T, causes my throat to tighten up so painfully and I end up choking (not in the literal sense).

It seems to me you really just need something to vent too. Have you tried therapy before? It can be hard at first (as it was to me because of my inability to even begin speaking), but it feels real nice just to have someone sit there and listen all the way through before trying to help you (and knowing they will help you makes the experience better).

And maybe in your times of frustration that wants you to cause SH, you could use an outlet to curb the urges. Writing is nice, but instead of writing your feelings, you can use a character to do so. You can use the feelings for a situation involving that character or you could try to distract yourself from the feelings and think of a whole different situation for them. You could even surprise yourself with how creative you can be!

I understand you must feel lonely and angry where you are and it does suck that if you meet someone online that understands that they are so far away. But I guess it's better to have known them than not as at least you could vent instead of have it bottled all inside.

[Sannah]

Originally Posted by greyclouds

I feel I have to try and convince people of the way I'm feeling.

This ^ doesn't sound good. Sounds pretty frustrating actually.

[AngelWolf3]

I understand. I wish I had more to say, I am not good at that. But I can say I totally see where you are coming from with family, and RatherDream said some really great things that I can relate to as well.

I hope you feel better...(I don't know how to end posts sometimes, )

[picklewheeze]

I completely know where you are coming from.

People do not seem to realise when they tell us that we shouldny feel the way we do they are walking all over our feelings and our life really.

I think its very hard for pepple to understand and to be honest ive given up with most people. Just one or two who have had any mental health issues or are generalky more understanding people will be the only pwople i tell anything.

Mighy not be what you want to here but thays just hpw i feel.