I feel suicidal, I have not long come out of crisis too.
I have self harmed countless times today I can't stop it.
I have nothing left to live for, I keep getting hurt and bad things keep happening to me, I can't see a way out.

Don't hurt yourself Tink
Please go to the hospital and seek help

YYZ

[roads]

Sweet (((((((Tink)))))))
we care so much about you here
your Threadies adore you
Please call upon your support system ...
get hold of T, then call the mobile crisis
please do this NOW Tink!
Roadie

... (((Tink))) ... ...

I agree, please call your therapist or go to the nearest ER now, please? ... As bad as it is right now, it will pass ... Please, oh, please ... Don't give the bastards that (that being your life!) ... !!!

Pfrog is concerned and wants to hear from you that you are going to at least call your therapist, okay?

My Dearest tinkerbell ... ... I'd miss you something terrible if you did this ... Not only that, your abusers would win everything ... Please don't give them your life ... They don't deserve it ... I know it's hard ... I had to leave my whole family behind so I could survive them ...

That was 19 years ago, and I had almost succeeded in taking my own life ... I'm so glad now that I didn't ...

It's hard, It's difficult, It's tough, It's a struggle ... It plain just isn't fair ... But a lot of us here do care about you and I'd take every bit of the pain and suffering you're going through away if I could ...

Please reach out to your therapist and/or crisis team ... I didn't think mine could help me either ... But they did and I resisted them kicking and screaming the whole way ... Their job is to keep us safe until we are strong enough to handle it on our own ... And eventually I was able to ...

Sure, I sometimes still feel lost, weak and helpless ... Even beyond that ... Hopeless ... That's why I just got back into therapy myself ...

But it's nowhere near as bad now as it was when I first started out ... I just had to give myself permission to survive them (my abusers) ... It really does get better ... I promise ...

Oh, tink, just know that one person loves you and understands how you're feeling and is rooting for you even if it is from afar ...

,
Pfrog!

*Also PM'd Directly To Tinkerbell ...

[perseverance11]

Originally Posted by Tinkerbell..

I feel suicidal, I have not long come out of crisis too.
I have self harmed countless times today I can't stop it.
I have nothing left to live for, I keep getting hurt and bad things keep happening to me, I can't see a way out.

Hello Tinkerbell,

Don't hurt yourself. Keep us posted on how you are doing.
I think you should go to the hospital if you have suicidal thoughts.

[SoupDragon]

(((Tinkerbell))) - please keep yourself safe and if you feel you can't do that, then call the crisis team - let them do that for you until these thoughts and feelings pass.

Soup

[pegasus]

((( Tink )))

Did your T give you a number to ring when you feel like this? Do you have the number for the community mental health team? Please get hold of support near you. We all care about you and want what is best for you.

Thanks everyone.

I will answer all your kind PM's in the morning when my head is in a better place.
I was looking online on easy ways to kill myself and then my lovely friend from here message me on FB and she nagged me Lol.

Anyway I do feel quite horrible in myself, I am trying my hardest to keep myself together, I will see how I am tomorrow, I have T tomorrow anyway not seen her in almost 3 weeks because I was under crisis team, So hopefully that will do me good.

I want to get better everything is going wrong for me, So many people hurt me and I get sick of it, I heard yesterday that my dads trial is probably going to start in April (more stress) I really don't know how I am going to cope

[roads]

Tinks! Thank you for letting us know how you're doing. I'm so glad you see your T tomorrow--hang onto that, dear friend!!

April is a long way off, and trials have a way of undergoing all kinds of changes before we get to them.

Please make YOU priority One. Build whatever protections you need--you do not deserve to be hurt by ANYONE for ANY REASON.

Roadie

[Rose76]

Oh, Tink, you are far too valuable to give up on you. When we've been hurt beyond a certain point, it's hard to believe that good things, too, can happen in your future. The future is a mystery, and it might have something nice waiting for you. When you can't see a way out, it's time to not trust your vision. You may have to feel your way to it because you are in the dark. I hope you are not staying alone. (((HUGS)))

[Wren_]

(((((((((((((tink))))))))))))))))) i really hope you'll call that crisis team again if you keep feeling like this ... or call your t; someone who can be there for you thanks for your last post updating a little

I went to see my T today and she was so concerned about me and about how I am not looking after myself, She asked if I had any medication at home etc...

I was feeling so awful today and when walking through the town to see my therapist I felt so rotten that I started crying and felt like going home and as I was waiting in the room for my T to come out the room was full of other people I felt like they were all looking at me, I told my T this, She thinks I done well in going to see her considering the way I am feeling, I feel a little better in talking to her.

[roads]

I agree with her and I'm so proud of you! * big huge hugs *
Roadie

[SoupDragon]

Glad you are feeling a little better (((Tinks))) - when do you get to see her again?

I know it must have been hard to go to the appointment, but I am sure glad you did

Thanks.

I see her again next Monday Soup but she did say if I feel unsafe is to call the crisis team.

[SoupDragon]

Originally Posted by Tinkerbell..

Thanks.

I see her again next Monday Soup but she did say if I feel unsafe is to call the crisis team.

It does sound like she cares about you and understands how difficult it is for you right now. Hope this week is a little easier for you until you get to see her again.

[AngelWolf3]

I am glad you went to your T as well. I just now saw this post, and I am glad that things are a teensy bit better. Sending hugs your way, and thank you for keeping us updated on you.

[Wren_]

((((tink))) you did really well to go ... i'm glad you did
does knowing t is there for you still help you to know it is safe to call the crisis team again if you need to?

[likewater]

Hi, Tinkerbell. Thanks for posting here. We love you. And just so you know, there is no easy way to kill yourself. There is no good way to kill yourself. Like Pfrog said don't let your abusers win. It does get
better. Life is extremely unfair and difficult and painful -i know. It's also worth it. You are beautiful and perfectly created and meant to be here. Like Pfrog said, your crisis team and T are here to help yiu abd you are going to make it. May angels surround you.hug::

[Rose76]

Thanks for posting Tink. It sounds like you are able to trust your T. It sounds like your T cares about you. I am glad. Sometimes, you just can't go it alone. And when it seems like people are looking at you, and you fear they are thinking negatively . . . it may not be that. At least someone there might have been through the experience of feeling very awful, and that person might be saying a quiet prayer for you.

I hope you pass a quiet night and get some respite from your pain.

Today, I have had a rather awful day, I can't get motivated.

The feelings are still there, I have been in bed all day with these spinning thoughts
It is hard asking for help.

[perseverance11]

Did you call your T finally?
Have you seen her/him today?

I hope you will feel better soon.

I saw my T yesterday.

I feel bad today, I am not good at all.
I really can't go on, It is too painful.