Average age to start SI

I would say now that you have a good T, it would be wise for you to discuss better coping skills with her than to go with anything to do with real SI (which OD is NOT)......it's self harm, but not the same as SI. With SI, the pain that is caused by it causes natural body opioids to be released within the body to take away the emotional/mental pain that is being felt. The thing with SI that you don't want to start is that those opioids are as addicting as taking pill opioids.....one gets addicted to the act of SI because those opioids are released into the body & the body feels better for that short time.....but comes to desire that feeling....so it's not just the behavior that becomes a habit, but the feeling that one gets from it is actually addicting...more & more as the SI is continued.

Usually when people are young or don't have a good T to work with....they are the ones that turn to whatever they can find as a coping mechanism.....but with T & with age & hopefully learning better coping skills, one doesn't have to turn to something so truly harmful.

I knew a lady way into her 50's who was SI'ing.....even with a good T & pdoc.....but she refused to learn any other coping skills & wanted to hold onto her SI'ing......she wasn't really open to the help of her T it was more like she had to go to them....but fought against anything they said....but her need for attention & someone to care about her was greater than her desire to get better & live without the attention & care that she received from her T & pdoc........I got to know her & her living situation quite well otherwise I wouldn't have been able to observe those needs she had.......sadly, it was sooooo obvious & very sad. Her struggle to find the right meds to help with her bipolar or take them when she did find something that seemed to work. (I met her in the local psych hospital I was in several times when she was there also)

My suggestion is that you haven't started to SI, DON'T. You have a wonderful new T.....work with her on getting real working coping skills rather than allowing yourself to be satisfied with something that is harmful & will cause you more harm in the long run.

Thanks Eskie,
That explains a lot to me, and really makes sense. I appreciate your time and concern, and I am see your concern in pushing me in the right direction

I don't know when it started exactly, but I know I started using sharp objects when I was about 9.
I'm glad it's over now

i started cutting at age 11 but i have done other self harm as long as i can remeber (i only remeber to age 9)

I started around 14, at first by scratching myself but then moving on to using a razor blade. I guess scratching counts - the thought process driving it is still the same.

I know I was at 8 before that I'm not sure

For me it was around 11 or 12. I think the tendencies show up in early age if they aren't dealt with, so I'd think they could really manifest at any time in life with certain triggers.

I started cutting when I was 14, but pretty sure I was hitting myself, biting myself, ect from around 6

As everyone has said, the ages vary tremendously. You could be 8 or 40. It is just like anything else - a way to cope. People smoke at different ages, try drugs at different ages, and even drink at different ages. Obviously these things generally start in our teens or when we are kids. I would suggest that that is due to the fact that our teen years are some of the hardest to get through, and it also does not take us long to be unhappy with our lives. This is why many kids/teens find other coping methods. I was personally 17 when I began to cut.

Averages would say is 12-16. But everyone is different. I started self injuring at age 8.

I started at the age of 11.... currently I am 14 and still doing it....it all depends on your reason, really.... mine was bullying, isolation, and the unawareness of my mental problems....

I would think that it is more common for si to begin in the pre-teen years to early teens when kids are going from the safety of childhood to the uncertainty of finding themselves. Problems seem more devestating at that age. Pre-teens (around 12 yrs), and early teens are learning how to cope with new feelings, independance and figuring out relationships of all kinds. They are particularly volatile and don't shake off teasing or insecurities about themselves easily. Some kids turn this outward, teasing others, starting fights etc, while others turn things inward, becoming isolated, depressed or self destructive. (You'll notice that this is also the age when kids shoot up schools). The coping mechanisms we learn at that age tend to change with age for "normal" kids, but kids on the outer edges get stuck. They continue to use the same coping mechanisms, usually destructive, and can't seem to move on. There may have been a time for a kid when SI seemed to relieve their emotional pain, and perhaps even succeded in an adult noticing their pain and interviening, but the relief was only temporary. Once the kid is an adult, SI may still temporarily relieve emotional pain, but it also becomes a behavior that brings the person shame and is kept secret.

The sad thing is that if an adult had taken the time to aggressively interviene, and get the kid into therapy, some of the people on this forum wouldn't have to come here.

Sam2