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#1
Sep 18, 2006, 10:17 PM
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look i dont know how everyone deals with pressure and life, but all i can do is run. i started late june, and i did it all through summer. One reason why i stopped was because my parents noticed, friends, people at work..ect) but now i have scars. so how do i make up for it? i guess sometimes i feel like, im already screwed so what the heck...
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#2
Sep 18, 2006, 11:06 PM
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Stop because it only gets worse. Keep going and it will only do more damage emotionally and physically to you and the ones who care about you.
You don't want to be dependent on it. Trust me. You don't want your entire life to revolve around it, nor do you want to feel as if you can't make it without it. Stop while you can... even if that is one of the only reasons... just because you can.
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God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. |
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#3
Sep 18, 2006, 11:58 PM
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yeah its just that when things get so out of hand, its saying those things to yourself that are the hardest. but your right i dont want to become dependent on it...
thanx, i dont think i need as much as i did before. i can find other ways to cope |
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#4
Sep 19, 2006, 01:28 AM
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Yeah, SI always becomes worse and worse... as you do it more you're prepared to inflict more pain and damage on yourself. I've got bad scars now on both my arms, very noticeable and very red, so I can't wear short-sleeves now but *shrugs* it's my own fault so I can't complain. But, I started SI and intended never ever to touch my arms... same with ODing... I meant never ever to OD and instead ended up taking quite a lot of stuff several times... stupid of me... but at the time I felt so self-destructive that I didn't care... so better to avoid SI at all, because it always gets past self-imposed limits.
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That's why it's such a serious thing to ask a Centaur to stay for the weekend. A very serious thing indeed. - The Silver Chair |
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#5
Sep 19, 2006, 06:09 PM
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I totally agree with everybody else..stop now while you can. After 10 years of living with this...it totally cotrols me. I never meant for it to go this far, or get this bad... if someone would have told me in the beginning where I'd be now... it would have helped. Please, quit now before it begins to control you. Do it just because you CAN do something good for you!
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“People are like stained-glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in, their true beauty is revealed only if there is a light from within.” Elizabeth Kubler- Ross |
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#6
Sep 20, 2006, 01:32 AM
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No one ever means to let it get to the point of taking control, but that doesn't stop it from doing just that.
__________________
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. |
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#7
Sep 20, 2006, 02:11 AM
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Hi woods -
I started a few months before you did and it was one of the hardest things ever to stop when I did. It is hard to make up for doing it and you probably will never forget having started but it is possible to stop the behaviour before it controls you. You are not screwed. It is a hard (and addictive) coping mechanism and people need those coping mechanisms to deal with stressors. Your choice of relief is not the worst - but it is not the best option either. Some things that helped me were: finding someone to talk to about anything - SI, emotions, stress just anything that's on your mind - that you can express to that person without fear that they will ridicule you. It is not necessary for that person to be a professional (like a therapist) but it should be someone who knows that if things get too bad that they should call someone who has training/experience in that area. Find yourself a hobby - something, anything that will keep you occupied so you're not really paying attention to the thoughts, or that you have no time to SI. If you can find something that you can do at almost any time during the day, even better. (((woods))) please take care of yourself. PM me if you ever want to talk. ps. sorry I sound so insensitive here - I'm not really but I feel strongly about this ... I apologize profusely if I make you uncomfortable or appear rude - I really don't intend to do that.
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#8
Sep 20, 2006, 12:51 PM
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thanx. ha its okay..its hard to make me feel uncomfortable. but yeah...see my parents dont ever want me to talk to strangers (understandable) but at the same time i dont. i was caught on another website like this, helping and getting things out myself. they told me i was selfish and they said id become isolated or something if i kept it up (like id have social problems or something) but all they wanted to here was that it was a "dating website". so they grounded me. for over a month from the computer and on and off from everything and everyone. thanx for offering to talk to me...ill take it up sometime.
.....but i supose its the times that i need to talk and i cant get on the computer to do so. i have friends but the one's that understand this kind of thing, think about suicide and all that kind of stuff. all the rest of my friends think its gross..so we dont talk about it. |
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#9
Sep 20, 2006, 07:25 PM
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This article might help you fellows..... [http://deseretnews.com/dn/view/0,1249,595048663,00.html
__________________
"It hit me like a ton of bricks!" 
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#10
Sep 21, 2006, 02:15 PM
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Woods, I'm probably not going to be very popular with you for what I'm about to say, but you really do need to talk to your parents!
You can't do any of this all on your own! 
__________________
Psalm 119:105 Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path. |
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#11
Sep 21, 2006, 07:03 PM
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(SeptemberMorn)-mm well you know. i dont know how to do that. id do just about anything else. i wish i could go to them...but i really cant. they wouldn't understand. i dont think they want to.
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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