Starting to hate my scars

I didnt really mind having scars. I kept them hidden a lot of the time. The last year or so I havent really made an effort to hide them, and they have been noticed from time to time but most people are smart enough not to mention them.

Lately I have been looking at them and wishing I had my nice smooth beautiful skin back. I have damaged this body and I regret it. These marks will never leave me, they constantly remind me of those terrible times. I hate the reminder.

I have little growths that need to be removed caused by so much cutting, many of my scars hurt and are hard and lumpy. I have some lingering nerve damage in places. They are noticeable in photos and when my skin starts to tan in summer, they stick out like bright white lines showing everyone what I did to myself. So humiliating.

I never thought of the long term consequences, who knows what else will pop up from abusing my body. I wish I had never started.

sorry, supernova

sometimes you don't realise what you had until it's too late

i've been doing the same with some of mine

thinking to myself.. well, how'd it get to the stage where they are so deep?

I used to hate my scars and I hid them for years and years... I mostly only harmed myself on my legs, but I too have some pretty bad a very visible scars. Then one day, I just decided I didn't care anymore. They are a part of my past, but they are also something I have overcome in my life. (I am in recovery and haven't self-harmed since before June of this year.) I don't know if you are in the same spot or not, but if so, please remind yourself of this. If you are still self-harming, that use this to motivate yourself to recover.

I am so sorry, friend. I only have a few on my arms, and when I see them I get very uncomfortable. It's a hard thing to learn to manage, and it takes time.

If they are causing you physical pain, please go through seeing your doctor and figuring something out. You've already survived so much pain. You don't need anymore. Take care.

Thanks for the support guys I wasnt sure why I was posting but Im glad I did.

I havent cut properly in years but have had a few little hiccups. Last time I cut was a couple of months ago because of PMDD.

The scars have been checked out, there is nothing the GP will do about them. He said some pain is normal. I have little growths and cysts popping up everywhere that will need to be removed at some stage, that are caused by cutting. So more scars...

I didnt care about them for so long, this is definitely a new thing for me to be bothered by them.

When everything is said and done with the cysts have you thought about a cover up tattoo?

Nice suggestion Tattoos arnt really my thing, I always worry I will get one when I am manic and regret it the rest of my life haha. Im going to try and use rosehip oil on them and see if that helps any, its cleared up acne scars on my face so who knows, it might work on my arms and legs too.