[SheHulk07]

What's your protocol on going to the hospital? Like how do you know you need to go? Do you call your therapist first or a crisis line? Does your therapist meet you at the ER? (I go to a community center and they say someone can meet you at the Er).

I just think about this a lot. Last weekend's episode was bad for me, and my therapist has mentioned going if I need it. But truthfully I don't think I could muster up the courage to go unless it was f orced.

[IGotThis]

Originally Posted by AmyFed07

What's your protocol on going to the hospital? Like how do you know you need to go? Do you call your therapist first or a crisis line? Does your therapist meet you at the ER? (I go to a community center and they say someone can meet you at the Er).

I just think about this a lot. Last weekend's episode was bad for me, and my therapist has mentioned going if I need it. But truthfully I don't think I could muster up the courage to go unless it was f orced.

For me, I had to make a list of things that mean I need to go... They include not being able to think about anything else, feeling too weak to fight the urges, things like that... But ultimately, I know I need to go when I can't get over wondering if I should or shouldn't go.... My dance teacher took me the first time, because I was too scared to go myself... I didn't see my therapist there (I had just started with her though, so it would have been uncomfortable), but having Laura there really helped me get the help I needed and not be too scared to... I think if you are fighting with being too scared to go on your own, it may help to choose someone specific, and talk to them about it, and see if you can come up with a plan so that if you need to go, but you are too scared, they can go with you and support you through that process... I'll admit, it was terrifying for me, but having her there made it much easier, because I wasn't facing the hard part alone... Now we have an agreement that if I call her anytime after 9:30, or while she is at work, I just have to tell her where I am and she will come get me and take me... It makes it a lot less scary knowing that no matter what happens, I won't have to face it alone.... That may help for you, too...

[SheHulk07]

Thanks for your advice. I don't know anyone other than my therapist or another therapist that works for the center that I would trust meeting me at the ER. My husband doesn't understand the self injury, doesn't know about the suicidal thoughts, so surprisingly he would not be the person I could turn to in a crisis.

[IGotThis]

Would you be able to talk to him some about it? At least enough to be able to go to him in a crisis... He doesn't have to understand to be there for you... If not, that's fine, my own mother barely knows, short of that I went in for being suicidal, and now I go to therapy... And I still wouldn't go to her... But I think it may be useful to, if nothing else, get a game plan with him as to how to handle that situation if it comes about... I would talk to your therapist and see what their opinions are of meeting you at the hospital and whatnot... They may have some better advice than me for you...

[MusicLover79]

I went to the hospital once, and I texted my therapist and told him I was there and why. We were in contact until they took my phone and I texted him when I got out. I think just know when you need to go. I had always felt like I had things under control but when I knew I would hurt myself really bad and knew that I couldn't fight the urges, I drove myself and went.

[SheHulk07]

Originally Posted by IGotThis

Would you be able to talk to him some about it? At least enough to be able to go to him in a crisis... He doesn't have to understand to be there for you... If not, that's fine, my own mother barely knows, short of that I went in for being suicidal, and now I go to therapy... And I still wouldn't go to her... But I think it may be useful to, if nothing else, get a game plan with him as to how to handle that situation if it comes about... I would talk to your therapist and see what their opinions are of meeting you at the hospital and whatnot... They may have some better advice than me for you...

I've tried talking to him, and he just says it's not funny to think like that, It's stupid to self harm, etc. It's just one of those things that would probably be better if I just did it without him.

[IGotThis]

Ok.... Well, what are your options from here? I know you have your therapists, but in the case that they are unavailable, say they were with another client already, what options do you have? Is there anyone else that you know of that you could start a more personal relationship with that you could trust with supporting you?

(Also, and this is just me digging in where I don't belong, it really bothers me that he won't support you, especially in those times of need... I have to wonder if he is just putting you off like that because he is scared of it... Is there any way you can talk to him and tell him HOW you need his support, so that maybe he will be better equipped to help you through it? I just find it hard to believe he just doesn't care)

[SheHulk07]

Truthfully, he has his own stuff that I think he needs to work on; he's probably scared as well. Lately we've hit a rough spot in our relationship because of many other stressors.

I really don't know anyone else that I'm comfortable with enough to let them know what's all going on with me. It's something I need to look into about other options; all I know is that the community center says that someone can meet you at their emergency center or at the ED if needed, but it probably wouldn't be my therapist anyway.

[IGotThis]

Ah I see... That's definitely tough...

Do you go to church or anything?

[SheHulk07]

I'm in school, but I'm still getting to know the girls. Got some social anxiety too. :-)

[IGotThis]

Oh, I understand that completely!!! I guess I would say just keep talking here, but also keep working on talking to them, so that eventually perhaps someone at school will be able to be a support for you... It may not happen, but I think it would be wonderful for you if you could.

[SheHulk07]

I've just been worried too much over this and my ability to cope with the holidays coming up, school, and having surgery 5 days before Christmas. Thank you for your help.

[IGotThis]

I understand how you feel. I'm in school as well... While I do live at home, my mom has a lot of issues of her own, which is why I go to my dance teacher... When I first told me mom I was suicidal, she just yelled at me because I had no reason to feel like that and it was stupid... I'm too scared to tell her about my si...

I am here any time!! Seriously- I don't sleep much, and with the exception of work, I essentially don't exist without my phone.if you need me, or anyone, just holler, and I'll be here

[ThisWayOut]

I go with my wife most of the time, but lately I feel embarrassed having her come with me. I prefer that someone just drop me off... I have had my supervisor take me once, and while I was in a day program that was run by the hospital, a clinician there has walked me over (the day program was across the street form the hospital).

I have yet to get good at knowing I should go on my own, but I will talk to my therapist to confirm whether I should go... I still don't like to be the one to make that decision.

Hope you can find some balance in the coming weeks.

[SheHulk07]

Thank you. That's my problem is I don't know when is enough for me. My therapist has told me 2-3 times that he thought I should go to the hospital, but he said it's up to me, so I didn't go.

Even with the last SI incident I had, I didn't think it was that serious so I didn't go.