[Wysteria]

This may be a taboo question or not appropriate, but when you self-injure, do you have a specific pattern or process and does it have a specific meaning to you. I always SI in a specific way/pattern....and my T asked my why. I think I have figured it out, but don't want to tell him. I'm terribly ashamed.. Just asking if others feel the same way...

thanks for any input,
WB

[tealBumblebee]

Originally Posted by Wysteria

This may be a taboo question or not appropriate, but when you self-injure, do you have a specific pattern or process and does it have a specific meaning to you. I always SI in a specific way/pattern....and my T asked my why. I think I have figured it out, but don't want to tell him. I'm terribly ashamed.. Just asking if others feel the same way...

I don't know if it's a pattern per-say but in my old spot I drew a box (that T asked about) and I explained to her that the box was my border so that I would not allow myself to cut too far/too much. She said that it was yet another way of implementing "controlled boundaries".

In that box, I've done a chevron pattern and a plaid pattern - though i'm not sure why for either.

My newer area is much larger, and no matter how hard I try I always seem to end up with that box pattern. With the exception of random tangents, I still find that even without my borders, a very obvious square pattern still exists.

It's not something I plan, but its obviously not something I can control either I guess.

[Wysteria]

Thanks TealBumblebee....it helps to know that I am not alone...there are numbers involved in terms of number of strokes/position etc that always just happen...like I said, I think I figured it out, but cannot discuss. I like that you set your "borders" or boundaries for how far you will go. I hope it gets smaller instead of bigger and you find more ways to heal/substifute/distract/heal in the future...
Respectfully,
WB