Relapsed

All can say is what bad girl I am

You are not a bad girl, you just made a mistake. I find that when I relapse I learn more about my triggers and what I can do to prevent it from happening again. Hang in there. We are here for you.

I feel so guilty for what I have done. I haven't done anything like this in a while, at least 3 months. Also it's been a year since have been hospitalized which is a big deal for me because I was in at least 2-3 times if not more in a year with some years being much more. The self destructive voice lives inside me again. Stronger then before in many ways. Wanting to hurt myself so bad to punish myself for being bad. I don't know why am so angry, guess just a lot of things have been going on. Putting everything on hold for people who need me sometimes is getting harder and harder. Harder to quiet the voice so had to give in. Just didn't think I would come back to this place. Not a great start to a new year.
Love and hugs,
Jen

Why do you think you need to punish yourself? What have you done that you think is worth harming yourself over?

Never mind it doesn't matter

Thanks

I'm sorry you are feeling so bad Jen. Please try to not be too hard on yourself. I know it can be extremely hard but we do slip up sometimes. But it is possible to get back up again. I know the voices are strong now but they will fade again in time.

Can you remember some of the strategies you used when you stopped last time? What helped you stop? They might be able to help you get up again now. I know that you mentioned that the voices are stronger now but they might still help to relieve some of the intensity.