[PinkFlamingo99]

Is self-neglect common among people who self-harm? Does anyone else do it to the point where they can barely function? My house has gotten so bad I have been sleeping in a recliner for months because my bedroom is too disgusting and this has been repeating over and over and over since I moved out at 18. I have such trouble with basic self-care and I barely function most of the time.

I do things constantly because I just don't care enough to keep myself safe. I don't clean my cuts that are deep enough for stitches, but I don't get them stitched most of the time either. I let even the deep wounds gape without a bandaid under my pants or sleeves and they get covered with fluff and stuff. Last time I only put on a bandaid because my therapist was freaking out about infection and said at least put a bandaid if I refused to get stitches. I also use razor blades I keep on my horribly filthy floor, and I think that's part of it. It adds an element of disrespect to it, if that makes any sense.

I have bad picking issues and I do it with filthy hands even though there is sanitizer everywhere. I get infections and in a way I kind of like it. The more germy my hands might be the better it feels.

I eat horribly just because I find it hard to care enough to feed my body the things it needs. I have trouble taking meds for anything that isn't psych related (because I DO want to feel better, but I don't care about my body). I have trouble making myself go to work or school or anything and have failed over and over because I just don't care enough about myself to take care of myself and make sure I have money.

My credit is horrible, I just declared bankruptcy with a debt of almost 100k. I knew what I was doing when I ran up my credit, that I could never pay it and it would ruin my credit score, but I didn't care.

I can name a million ways I disrespect myself and don't look after myself. Don't take care of myself when I'm sick, didn't take care of myself after surgery, etc.

Anyone else? In a way I find this the worst because it's a whole attitude. I'm working on changing the self-harm but the other stuff seems worse.

[TheOriginalMe]

I don't neglect my cuts, I get something from the ritual of being able to care for them, but I neglect myself in so many other ways.

I enjoy gardening, but it is six feet high in weeds.
The kitchen walls need a good wash.
The toilet broke in the bathroom and I used a bucket for 6 weeks.
I haven't cleaned my bedroom since February and I can't see the floor because of clothes and bags of stuff.
There are holes in the carpets throughout the house.
I haven't decorated in 20 years.
I shower once a week.
I am about to lose my job and can't be bothered to look for other jobs.
I don't eat properly and deliberately dehydrate myself.
Refused to take meds when I was physically ill, even though I was bleeding heavily and wanted the bleeding to stop.

You are right, the urge to self-destruct is a whole attitude that is overwhelming. Do you a T to help you work through these issues? Is there just one thing that you could change that might start the ball rolling on the other things? I'm told I need to develop self-compassion, do you feel that to be an issue for you?

I actually applied for a job today, that was slight progress I suppose, but I already had an old application that I adapted. I want the job, but I can't envisage being motivated enough to present myself well at an interview.

[Fizzyo]

I feel self neglect is part of the whole attitude I have that contributes to wanting to self injure. Sorry you feel as bad as you do. I hope you can find some way to be kind to yourself, even in a small way, you do deserve it.

[Fizzyo]