[OneLove92]

So short and quick....

now coming to 3 sessions ago, my therapist told me that if i kept SIing she would have to stop therapy. Or may have to stop therapy. Cant fully remember.

Has any of you been told that? I was harm-reducing. Not allowing things to be out, only in a locked box put away so I couldnt SI while disassociated. Reducing amount or severity. Then she says that. She expected cold turkey, like that....

Im kinda freaked out about my appointmetn on Wednesday.
I SI, after 2 1/2 weeks.

I hate myself atm. I dont want to lose therapy, but its not like i intentionally did it. I "came to" like that.

[Skeezyks]

Hello OneLove92: I have not had the experience you're having with your therapist. But I just wanted to comment that not all therapists are able to work with all circumstances. Perhaps your T simply feels inadequate in light of your continued SI. She may not be willing to admit to this, in so many words. But that may be the reality of it. I have seen a number of therapists in the past who simply had no idea what to do with me... & it showed. After a while, I just gave up on them altogether.

From my perspective, what your T should do, if she feels she can no longer treat you, is to refer you on to another professional whom she feels may be better qualified. This is what the therapists I saw should have done too. But, of course, they seldom do. They're like used car salesmen. They just want your money. And if they can't "sell" you, they're on to the next customer. At least that's my view of it. Please do not hate yourself because your therapist is inadequate. If you didn't have the struggles you have, you wouldn't need her to begin with!

I certainly hope that your T will be willing to continue to treat you. But, if not, I would suggest asking her for a referral to another therapist who can. The reality of the situation is, though, that you probably will have to find a new therapist yourself. But, remember, it's not your fault. Please don't allow her inadequacy to cause you to hate yourself...

[OneLove92]

Thanks.

Since this was a one time thing I kinda want to not tell her cause I will lose her. Therapy is my last hope at fixing me. What I find kind of sad is I told her that.

My reality though is, everyone else who meant something to me has left me too. Why should she be any different....

[jenniy122]

Possible trigger:

After my last suicide attempt

a month and half ago my therapist told me if I made any attempt to hurt myself she was done with me. If I die she could lose her license, I'm a liability. She offered to refer me to someone else at my current practice or help me find someone online though. I've been seeing her for nearly 3 years and she's just at her wits end, she doesn't know how to help me anymore.

[Fizzyo]

Originally Posted by OneLove92

Thanks.

Since this was a one time thing I kinda want to not tell her cause I will lose her. Therapy is my last hope at fixing me. What I find kind of sad is I told her that.

My reality though is, everyone else who meant something to me has left me too. Why should she be any different....

Maybe jenniy is right.

Not all therapists have the same expertise. She may have said that to someone and they were able to stop.

If she is any good she should be able to suggest someone with more skills in this area, if not, it's good you found out that she's not able to help with this.

You did the right thing to tell her, if she didn't know, there was no chance she could help you address it. It's hard to change, but it could be for the better.

Are there any organisations in your area for people who self harm? They may be able to suggest a therapist who specialises in helping people who want to try to reduce self harm.

I saw someone for a short time, funded by a charity and it really helped, though I'm not cured yet, I have more chance to kick the habit.

Whatever you do from here, the best of luck and I really hope you get the support you need.
❤️

[Fuzzybear]

I agree... Please do not hate yourself becaue your therapist is inadequate.

[mellybelly]

Just because one person can't help you doesn't mean you will never get over this. Keep looking, keeping reaching out. The only way you won't get better is if you give up.

[random_emotion]

When I was younger I had a therapist tell me the same thing and it makes you feel really yucky I'm sorry

[Fizzyo]

Originally Posted by OneLove92

My reality though is, everyone else who meant something to me has left me too. Why should she be any different....

Sorry that is your experience. It makes therapy harder, as it is their job to help you find your strength so you can cope without them (or if they can't, maybe help you find a therapist who can. It's not like other relationships, though it is often even more intense.

I really feel for you, but I know you can get through this; you've survived so far after all, haven't you, despite all you've been through.
I hope this experience will prove to be a stepping stone towards feeling more able to cope in the long run.

Take care and be kind to yourself.

[PinkFlamingo99]

That's messed up though. Has she made any attempt to refer you to a higher level of care or anything, or would she leave you all alone?

[OneLove92]

Well my therapist is trained in DBT, Crisis intervention, specializes in BPD, Self harm, eating disorders etc. So I guess thats what shocked me.

I didnt end up lying to her about it, i told her. She was all like "only once in 2 weeks, good job"

So it was kind of confusing. Now (2 sessions later) She is all no, no, stop all together. Quit alcohol, try to reduce smoking. blah blah blah.

Idk if i can fully blame her i guess. I have not trusted her fully to explain the why, I only know 1/2 of the why. The other half is the disassociating.... thats the part im having a harder time controling....

And Im on disability I cannot afford a private therapist but she is supposed to be the best for alot of different things. Plus she worked at the highschool I went to as a 2nd therapist. Its a bit easier to talk to her, but not completely yet.

I have only survived thus far by the grace of god.

[doyoutrustme]

i am very distrustful of Ts who advertise all the things they "trained" in. it just shows that they lack in everything else and kind of subside on lots of training classes. i go phD, or pdoc. to start. then i feel then out.