is that

Possible trigger:

I harm for the blood, not the pain.

things like hitting a pillow or banging a wall don't work for me

when people ask me, this is how I always respond: it is for the blood

and that's why it's so hard for me to find other distractions

[SlumberKitty]

I get that. HUGS Kit

Would using red paint on yourself help?

[Fuzzybear]

I was wondering if red markers might help. Or drawing a very angry red picture maybe.