[x_BabyG_x]

A woman came in work today and as I served her, I noticed she had loads of purple scars on her arms...

They were old, but you could tell that she made quite a mess of them - they looked like she had cut really deep.

Its really uspsetting when you see it from the other side. It makes me feel bad because id never want someone to go through the pain that I go through and the struggle that comes with it.

It also made me trigger off a bit. I miss it, I miss it even more, everyday my scars are fading and I need them there. I got jealous of that woman in a way because she still has her marks - as sick as it sounds... but its true. I hated work today because i was thinking about it and there was even one time when a co worker handed me a drawing pin to put in the bin, and I went on automatic and put it aside to save for when it was quiet and I could have a little dig... then I though 'what am I doing!??' and put it in the bin.

My cousin overdosed and is in hospital aswell. Shes been quite down for sometime, but I didnt realise she was that bad. Shes ok though I think. I hate to think she's been in the same 'should I , should I not' situation as me... it was just too bad she chose to go through with it and not get help.

oh, and my dad ate all my ben and jerrys

what a day, I hope tomorrows better

babyg xXx

Sorry you've had a rough day.

((((babyg))))))

[alyssa_angel]

((baby))

[Fuzzybear]

((((((((((((( BabyG ))))))))))))))

[bchlyn]

i hope tomorrow is better for you too... take gentle care ... and the good thing about ben and jerry's is there is always more at the market... stay safe...lyn

[Kiya]

Sending over the Phish Food!!!

[bipolar_bear]

((((((((((((((((BabyG))))))))))))))))))) I am sorry you had such a rough day.

BB

[x_BabyG_x]

Tomorrow was a better day for me

I cant stop thinkign about the lady with the scars though...

I was thinking about it at work today and it made me realise that anyone can do it..... so I started checking peoples arms out when I was working on the tills today...

The results were shocking.. can you have a guess how many people I counted who's marks were an OBVIOUS encounter to old or recent SI?? Five... In the space of an hour. I cant believe how much we dont notice people... we are so wrapped up in our own pain we dont realise others were suffering

They look like ordinary people, because they are an ordinary people. Some of them even had children with them. I know the subject is less known and less talked about than other addictions, but Im starting to think that its more common than people realise.

My cousin rang me today, she's still in hospital, they sent a psychiatrist to see her and she regrets it deeply. I am going to see her at weekend for a chat, Im glad shes okay though

babyg xXx