[Cthomas]

Ive been good. ive been trying. and it seems that no matter what i do. the thoughts rear theyre ugly heads. the only good thing today is i wont have access to my phone or email becuase it will be very busy.

Keep everything crossed that the urges go away.

me

[purplebutterfly]

((((((Colleen))))
Hang in there, you can get thru this urge, I know you can do it.

[Kiya]

keeping everything crossed that you can ride it out.... urge surf.

hugs

[bipolar_bear]

Hoping you were able to resist. Hanging in there with you.

BB

[jacq10]

(((((((Colleen))))))))

[Cthomas]

Ive not cut, im proud to say. but with all the drama in my life these days i find it difficult to not harm myself.

Hope you all can resist the urges today as well.

Stay safe,
Colleen

[bchlyn]

sorry i wasn't here for you colleen just wanted to let you know i am thinking about you... and am glad that you were able to keep safe... lyn

[Cthomas]

Thanks lyn,

However today is just another day of trying not to again.

I hope you and kiya are safe.

Take care friend,
Colleen

PS im trying.

[bchlyn]

you can do it colleen, i believe in you... if it helps i am having one of those days too... your not alone...lyn

[Cthomas]

Thanks lyn. almost time to leave and go to second job...night job....ugh

I hope we can both stay safe.

me

I wish you lots of luck with your urges. I just went 11 months without hurting myself and everything was building up and building up and building and finally I had my bottle of Seroquel in my hand and had already taken 1000mgs which is way too much and then I just got out my knife and sliced up my arm pretty good to a point where I had seen enough blood to relax me and take away the urge.

I am new here, but plan to, or I am going to "try" to be active, so I will look for your posts and try to be helpful when I can.

Right now I am not of much help besides saying to you good luck in your struggle. I have been hurting myself since age 14 and dont have no idea why I started. I have abused growing up mentally and physically, and then at age 9 and 10 I was sexually abused and 4 years after that is when I started.?? I have no idea buddy, I will try my best to be supportive.

I am Mikey by the way and from PA. I am 33 years old. Nice to meet you. Try your best to keep busy, my advice, how I lasted 11 months without cutting.... I stayed very busy. When the depression set in, that is when everything started to build up in my mind and stuff and I was getting very bad headaches and it lead me to do what I did.

Good Luck
Nice to meet you
I look forward to a good experience here.
Take Care
Mikey/PA <font color="blue"> </font>

[Towanda]

Hi Colleen, Iam new to this board but wanted to reply to your post. Hope that is ok.
I used SIB to handle overwhelming feelings until about three months ago. I am struggling with going back to this behavior (just lost my third job in 2 years!) but so far so good. I try to take life a minute at a time some days.
Hang in - I know you can make it.
Linda

[RozG]

please ((((((((Colleen)))))))) no, we care very much that you don't hurt yourself coz you mean so much....

[bchlyn]

how are things today? thinking and caring about you...lyn

[bipolar_bear]

(((((((((((((((((((((((Colleen))))))))))))))))))))))))))) How are you today?

BB

[Cthomas]

To pugsley, roz, and Towanda, lyn, Bipolar bear and anybody i missed, thanks so much for your replies.

I have not self injured. I am starting to slowly feel better. the pdoc put me on 150 mgs of seroquel a day and it seems to be working better. I am starting to feel better about myself.....hopefully this lasts.

Or if It dosent, maybe another upping of the drugs? dunno

Have a safe day all. I am sure going to try.

colleen