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Old Mar 29, 2009, 05:04 PM
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Berries Berries is offline
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i am so sluggish, so numb, so nothing. Yet concerned about my health at the same time.
i have ITP—a blood disease where your platelets get destroyed by your T-cells, and eventually they get so low you spontaneously start bleeding out internally and die.
i have been in remission from the ITP for 3 months now, or at least I was at last doctor’s appointment 2 months ago.
i have a funny feeling that my platelets are going down again. I don’t have a blood draw scheduled until April 9.
This feeling of not knowing makes me want to cut to see the consistency of the blood.
And the numbness also makes me want to cut.
Both the numb & lethargic feelings and this NEED to know right now, if my ITP is back is triggering me to SI. i left a voice mail on my T’s cell phone, like i am supposed to do, but he isn’t calling me back.
What should i do?


Last edited by Berries; Mar 29, 2009 at 07:09 PM.

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  #2  
Old Mar 29, 2009, 07:07 PM
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phoenix7 phoenix7 is offline
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ring your dr and let them know how anxious you are - see if you can get the test done now to settle your fears - and if T doesnt ring back - ring again - T may be in a session - and that may be why no call back - hang in there -
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When you have come to the edge of all light that you know and are about to drop off into the darkness of the unknown,
Faith is knowing One of two things will happen: There will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught to fly.
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Thanks for this!
Berries
  #3  
Old Mar 30, 2009, 06:29 AM
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phoenix7 phoenix7 is offline
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Berries how are you doing?
__________________
Its not how many times you fall down that counts
its how many times you get back up!
need help
(Thanks to fenrir for my Picture )

When you have come to the edge of all light that you know and are about to drop off into the darkness of the unknown,
Faith is knowing One of two things will happen: There will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught to fly.
by Patrick Overton, author and poet
  #4  
Old Mar 30, 2009, 08:55 AM
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Berries Berries is offline
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Location: in the glitch inside my brain
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Thank you for asking P7. I am doing about the same.

T never called me back. I feel a little upset about that. We had a safety contract. I was supposed to call if I felt suicidal or self-harmful. I kept my end up. But, then I feel guilty for being upset with him, because he sees me for practically FREE. And I am very grateful for that. He, so far, has treated me the same as a full paying patient, but I guess you get what you pay for.

I did some self harm, but not cutting. The self harm didn't hurt me. So, it is all good I guess.

I see T, at our regular time, today at 3pm.
  #5  
Old Mar 30, 2009, 05:37 PM
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phoenix7 phoenix7 is offline
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I'm sorry T didnt ring you back and I hope you discuss tha with him today - or yesterday? whatever day/time it is there!

Let me know how you go ok
__________________
Its not how many times you fall down that counts
its how many times you get back up!
need help
(Thanks to fenrir for my Picture )

When you have come to the edge of all light that you know and are about to drop off into the darkness of the unknown,
Faith is knowing One of two things will happen: There will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught to fly.
by Patrick Overton, author and poet
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