[Zloppy]

To start, me and my gf have been going out for a month. We were really good friends before, but now that we are going out, I have learned a whole new level of things about her that no one else really knows. I don't want to go and say too much, but I just have some questions. She said that years back she used to be gay. Not like she wanted to, but thats how she was. Now she is not. recently when we were talking about opinions on certain topics such as sex and stuff, she said that her hormones are all out of whack, and that she takes a small dose of birth control medicine to keep it all normal. Thats where I get my question from. Based on my knowledge (not much though) of birth control, doesn't it give a girl more estrogen, or whatever? Which would mean that she would have low levels of it already with the hormone imbalance. So could that be the reason she used to be gay? She didn't have enough estrogen, and then now she takes a little birth control, which I think has it in it, to make her strait? She has doctors notes about it too. I am just wondering because I thought of that today, and I don't want to be thinking that the only reason my girlfriend likes me is because of medicine she takes. I still love her anyways of course, but it would be weird. So can anyone explain to me better what this all means?

[Miracle1986]

I personally don't think birth control can "make a person straight"...
she might have just been going through a phase where she was exploring her sexuality.

[Zloppy]

Okay. I don't want to sound ignorant or anything. I just really don't know. i have been looking it up some more, and I don't think that is true. And I think you are right. When I looked up more, I realized that there are other things related with it that are different so it made more sense. I was just wondering though because of that other part I mentioned. Just wasn't sure.

[Miracle1986]

I understand.
Good for you researching it. Shows you care.

[Grithnir]

Well I would try and make sure she is attracted to you and this isn't a type of recircuiting of her brain that her family put her through from her original feelings of being gay. It seems like there are a few other lesbian women that are married and attracted to their male husbands but still it is something to think about. There is a great two book series by D. H. Lawrence, The Rainbow and Women in Love, about a girl named Ursala I think. She found herself attracted to a female teacher, but then to a man later, and the attraction had more to do with being intellctually stimulated by the two individuals and challenged. These things happen to a lot to people growing up but only sensitive or intelligent people acknowledge these feelings.

[Burbitine]

Caring for it will survive 50 percent of problems. I hope yours is that 50 percent.

[NuckingFutz]

I do not think sexual orientation has anything to do with hormones. As long as the attraction is there, I would not be concerned about it. Congrats on the relationship.

[salukigirl]

I think a bigger thing would be depression. Depression can make a person do things sexually that normally they would not. Because when I was in a severe state of depression I would find myself looking at women and having homosexual thoughts that, now that I'm on ad, I don't ever think of. Its very commendable of you to, not only be accepting of it, but try to understand it and empathize with her on how she feels.

[Supsup]

Generally girls are much more free about changing sexuality. Even straight girls are willing to experiment and bit and there is a much higher percentage of bisexual women than bisexual men. I read a theory that this is because when women are breast fed, they are having intimate contact with a person within their own gender and are therefore more comfortable with intimate contact within their own gender later in life. I doubt it has anything to do with her birth control pills, and if it was obviously she started liking men before than because you don't need birth control pills if you are a lesbian. Your girlfriend is fine, likely she either is bisexual or simply experimented at one time in her life.

[1flagwriter]

Have you tried just asking her? I would invite her into conversation about it.

[velma24]

My hormones are a bit screwed up and I'm as gay (lesbian) as they come (not stereotypical though). I've always been gay. Sounds like you need to ask your girl some questions.