[Big Mama]

WARNING TRIGGER RAPE PORN
PROCEED WITH CAUTION
Sorry if I offend anyone, I'm just looking for answers.

I was raped repeatedly over the course of 9 months. It wasn't a vicious rape. It was very calculated though. Someone's intent was very clear every time. There was no exscaping it.

Any way I take great relief in watching porn. In some ways porn show me that sex is ok. It is not a horrible sport. It can be enjoyable though I've never known it to be personally. It sure looks like someone is enjoying even if it is staged.

When I am under a great deal of stress watching porn seems to send my mind away to a safe place. Maybe it is because it captivates my full attention, I don't know.

It seems quite odd that an individual who has been raped would want to watch porn. I DO NOT watch forced, drugged, or harsh sex. I prefer female friendly that makes things appear there are feelings and love involved. Even though I know this is most likely acting.

Has anyone been raped or victim of an assault or rape, or other related act and find solace in porn or am I the only weird one?

I find porn to just be a way to further victimize those who've already been victimized. I realize that some people do it for the money or because they actually like sex ... However, many many more fall into it because they feel that's all theyre good for - damaged goods who aren't worthy of being treated in any other manner than what they were wrongly subjected to early on.

To me it's like those runaway kids and teens trying to escape being raped, beaten and brutalized at home only to end up being raped, beaten and brutalized on the mean streets after some two bit pimp takes them under their wing.

Then, there's the sex slave trade ... ...

How does one know what they're watching doesn't involve victims who are just being subjected to further exploitation ... ?!?!?

Would we really want to be a willing participant in the further victimization of people who've already had their minds, bodies and souls stolen from them?

I hope not.

[Big Mama]

I disagree, but I did ask. Thank you for your opinion.

[mazing]

I don't think it is weird at all. I personally don't use porn but can understand why some people would. It does show that sex can be something different - not just violent and punishment.

As long as it's not taking over your life, you aren't dependant on it and it doesn't make you feel worse/punish yourself thsn I don't see a problem with it

[Maven]

I don't think there's shame in watching porn, regardless if you've been raped or sexually abused or not. I don't think porn actors are all victims, and there are plenty of mainstream (non-porn) actors and actresses who have been victimized in their lives, so am I victimizing them further by watching them on-screen? Many TV and movie stars have been brought into a world of drugs, alcohol, excess and more, and are being eaten up by the business. Are we victimizing them by enjoying their movies? No.

We can often make this question about child actors, too. A lot of child actors grow up and don't have the same success they did when they were younger. They grew up around adult things, so are we victimizing them by watching them on TV and in movies?

Well, I think you get my point, so I'll stop here and see who says what next.

[hamster-bamster]

Originally Posted by Big Mama

Any way I take great relief in watching porn. In some ways porn show me that sex is ok. It is not a horrible sport. It can be enjoyable though I've never known it to be personally. It sure looks like someone is enjoying even if it is staged.

When I am under a great deal of stress watching porn seems to send my mind away to a safe place. Maybe it is because it captivates my full attention, I don't know.

It sounds like you have been able to find a great stress release technique for yourself - enjoy. I wish it did the same for me. Maybe I should ask you for specific title recommendations. I have just never been able to experience anything but amusement from porn. Admittedly, I did not try hard enough.

But clearly it works well - don't second-guess what works so well.

[Big Mama]

Hamster I have simple tastes. Is it really ok to say where I like to look an the web ?????? I do have a few (free and computer safe) preferences. I' can PM you or put it here for others to enjoy. You tell me. If others show interest I may put it here.

[mazing]

I believe that putting the links here might be in violation of the guidelines. Maybe just check with one of the mods first about sharing thost links on PC

[hamster-bamster]

Do as per the guidelines please! I appreciate the courtesy.

[Maven]

There are some soft-core porn movies that air on the premium channels (like Showtime, The Movie Channel, etc.) that I saw a few years ago that were just plain hilarious to me. They didn't have much plot, but they were made to be funny, and they were. My favorite actor in them was Evan Stone. I can't remember the titles, except one of my favorites was Bikini Pirates. Evan's in that, as well as one of my favorite adult actresses, Rebecca Love.

[hamster-bamster]

I do not have a TV. It has to be on the internet.

[Harley47]

I'm pretty sure posting the direct link is some sort of violation...I dunno. lol I know it is for almost every single message board I've ever been a part of, so I assume.

I think porn is absolutely fine, provided it, like all "vices," remains in moderation. I do agree with pfrog in that it is a rather disgusting industry that I'm not at all a fan of, which for me personally, puts me in a bit of an awkward situation. I don't like the professional industry, but I'm a fan of the product. That said, I usually keep away from "professional" production and tend to either read mine online (I've been recommended 50 Shades though) or go the "self made" route.

I don't think your past (which if you will allow me to say, I'm sorry that ever happened to you ) precludes you from it. As long as you keep it in moderation and as long as you keep in mind that it is exaggerated and acting, you're good to go, I'd say.

[Big Mama]

I ming check porn out once a month or so. Or when under extreeme stress. It just strikes me as strange. If I had talked to someone about rape I would NOT suggest pron as a safe outlet. I just find it strange that it is an outlet that I choose.

I will not post the sites I view. Don't want to break some kind of rule.

I know what kind of pron you are talking about my friend. It is like the soaps but they forget and really do take there clothes. I do like a little more passion then that.

[Harley47]

Nor would I. But traumatic experiences in my experience manifest themselves in a wide variety of ways. If it helps Big Mama, then so be it. My guess, and I do stress guess, is that it allows you to view sexuality A) Under your control and comfort and B) With a degree of passion, based on your preferences. That, I don't think, is unusual at all.

lol I think good call on not posting...lol I'm sure a quick google search is more than you could ever watch, and I'm sure someone could PM you or vice versa if you wanted swaps.

[oceancries]

That is perfectly natural it brings comfort to you.