[daidk]

I know it's a typical teenage thing to be confused about yourself and your sexuality etc, but I think this is a little different to the usual confusion people in my age range experience.
I'm attracted to guys with handsome faces and good bodies and I identify good looking guys as being sexy, and I am capable of becoming sexually aroused, so I know I'm not completely asexual.
But the thing is, I have a lot of trouble getting aroused. I usually don't find masturbation particularly stimulating, often I don't find it at all stimulating. I'm also pretty much indifferent (like 99%, and the other 1% seems to be somehow interested but not aroused) to pornographic images.
I've never had a proper boyfriend and I have no experience of sexual contact with another person, so I can't say for certain how that would make me feel, but my apparent indifference concerns me as I do want to someday be in a loving, healthy and sexually active relationship, but I worry that that might not be possible.
If anyone could tell me where any of this could have come from, or why I am the way I am in terms of sexuality, that would be greatly appreciated.
Thanks for giving me a place to share my concerns, by the way

[wife22]

First welcome
Being a teenager is a challenging thing to do.Not only you have to find your personality and try to find your place in the world,but you have immense amount of peer pressure and conflicting information from media.none of it is helping in stabilization of sexual maturity.
Some people "awaken" sexually later then others.do not worry about not being aroused yet,arousal depends not only on appearance ,but something more.there should be some connection to be aroused.Dont jump into relationship looking for arousal , you are way too young to call yourself asexual .you will meet a right person and things will be all right
Stay well

[growlycat]

Guilt and worry can dampen arousal. When you feel cared for, safe and confident I'm sure it will come naturally.

[sneakers13]

I know I didn't really experience real sexual arousal til a little later in my teen years then discovered I was bisexual. Before then I wasn't really interested, though I had some mild interest in both genders. Some people are late bloomers. That being said, you could be asexual. Most people I know who are asexual can still arouse themselves and masturbate, but others don't really want or need to. It's really whatever makes you happy. Also, don't be afraid to experiment to see what you really like and what you're really into. There's a lot of different things that can cause arousal other than the obvious stuff. Like I said though, it's whatever makes you happy.

[Ash89]

Masturbation does absolutely nothing for me, as in I never climax. Well, it has once or twice, but 99.999% of the time I start and shortly after stop. Sex to me is all emotional. If I'm not getting an emotional response from my fiance leading up to foreplay, I lose interest altogether.

Everyone is different. If you desire a relationship as you describe, you can have it. You just seem to be more of an emotional than physical person. When with the right person, both of those things entwine pretty nicely. Don't worry about how you are feeling right now, your sexuality will develop when you're in a comfortable situation.

In the meantime don't be afraid to explore your own body. Even though I never follow through with masturbating, certain touches can relax me and I know why I like. Makes it easier to communicate your spots to your partner.

[vans1974]

Originally Posted by daidk

I know it's a typical teenage thing to be confused about yourself and your sexuality etc, but I think this is a little different to the usual confusion people in my age range experience.
I'm attracted to guys with handsome faces and good bodies and I identify good looking guys as being sexy, and I am capable of becoming sexually aroused, so I know I'm not completely asexual.
But the thing is, I have a lot of trouble getting aroused. I usually don't find masturbation particularly stimulating, often I don't find it at all stimulating. I'm also pretty much indifferent (like 99%, and the other 1% seems to be somehow interested but not aroused) to pornographic images.
I've never had a proper boyfriend and I have no experience of sexual contact with another person, so I can't say for certain how that would make me feel, but my apparent indifference concerns me as I do want to someday be in a loving, healthy and sexually active relationship, but I worry that that might not be possible.
If anyone could tell me where any of this could have come from, or why I am the way I am in terms of sexuality, that would be greatly appreciated.
Thanks for giving me a place to share my concerns, by the way

I totally agree with wife22...whatever makes you happy!!

[hamster-bamster]

Originally Posted by daidk

I usually don't find masturbation particularly stimulating, often I don't find it at all stimulating.

I tried masturbation when I was 15 and did not feel anything, so I stopped. At 19, I discovered it all of a sudden, and was masturbating twice a day (in bed and in the shower) every day - so it was a matter of age.

Originally Posted by daidk

I'm also pretty much indifferent (like 99%, and the other 1% seems to be somehow interested but not aroused) to pornographic images.

What little porn I have seen was altogether stupid and ridiculous. I cannot comprehend how people find porn arousing because it is SO unimaginably stupid (I do realize that there are niche porn sites I have not visited - I am just talking about garden variety porn).

With my complete indifference to pornographic images, I sometimes have full body orgasms from mere thoughts without any stimulation in the genital area.

What this illustrates is that a person indifferent to porn can experience exquisitely refined sexual sensations - and, with luck, you might experience them one day, too, as you are probably simply too young now.