Virginity

my counseloor told me something really interesting one time - that to lose ones virginity they have to have intercourse. intercourse is defined as penetration into the vagina by the penis... So if a person has sex - oral, %#@&#!, or was masterbated they are still considered a virgine. I laughed because guys don't have a virgina so all these guys that are havingg sex together are still considered virgines and if a girl has sex with a girl they are still considered virgines because they are not having sex with a guy and his penis..Just something that I still am surprised about..

Hah. I don't know I never really thought of that before. But that's interesting.

> The common definition of a virgin is someone who has not had sex with a member of the opposite sex yet. Even this definition falls flat, though, when you realize that for many years, this was a physical issue, almost a medical one. A woman with an intact hymen was considered to be a virgin, and that was the end of the matter. Women in the Middle Ages, for example, were considered to be virgin if their hymen was intact. If a woman stretched or tore her hymen while horseback riding, she was simply and plainly no longer a virgin. If a woman was born with a tiny or nonexistent hymen, she was not a virgin.
It's also important to realize that there are still cultures today...

> This can seem strange to us, but it's important to keep in mind why the state of a woman's hymen was considered to be so vital -- it was the means by which one could prove that she had had sex with a man. A woman who had torn or stretched her hymen was "less valuable goods" (yippee for us, eh?) because her untouched state could not be determined with absolute certainty. A woman with a tiny or nonexistent hymen was similar. Thus a virgin was a woman who, it could be positively proven by physical evidence, had not had a penis inserted into her vagina.

http://www.io.com/~wwwomen/sexuality/virginity.html

And why was her 'untouched state' so important? Because in the days before paternity tests it was a way of being fairly sure that she wasn't already pregnant with another mans child.

(Though of course one can become pregnant without penetration breaking the hymen but I guess it is a lot less likely)

I call the penis-in-vagina sense of sex the 'Clinton definition' (for obvious reasons)

;-)

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alexandra_k said:
I call the penis-in-vagina sense of sex the 'Clinton definition' (for obvious reasons)

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Haha. Clinton definition.
When that whole controversy happened, that's when I first learned what sex was. Hehehehehe.

Yeah, virginity has been defined in many ways. I believe the main definition is intercourse between a male and a female, but for me, it's about more than that. It's about sexual knowledge through experience. I don't think of sexually active gay men as virgins, but if they haven't been with a woman, I suppose they could be, and lesbians the same. Then there's "oral virginity," "%#@&#! virginity" (I know that gets censored on this board), etc.

However, when someone asks, "Are you a virgin?" (like it's any of their business! Hmph! ) they usually mean, "Have you had intercourse with the opposite sex?"

Clinton educated many.

PER MEDICAL TERM:

FEMALES: You are no longer a virgin IF your hymen has been broken through sexual intercourse.

MALES: You are no longer a virgin IF you have had sex with another, either vaginal or an*l.

.... there you have it - Virginity in a Nut Shell.

There are lots of females having %#@&#! sex so that they can keep their virginity or that ..hey..they like it. Seems rather ludicrous to me to hold on to the ole virgin label once you have done that...hymen or no hymen.

Perhaps there are different kind of virgins...

just a test.... newbieish ...

If I said that I was feeling a little like things need to be the way they need to be.... or they must be and I said ... I am feeling a little %#@&#!... totally different context on a psych board (where Freud is everpresent) ... would I still get a % thingie?

3:30 am.... go to bed already...lol

yeah. i tried it already.

you can't be an %#@&#! personally but don't worry...
ones personality can be anally retentive :-)

lol....thanks.

Unfortunately that might come in handy for me....

Rhapsody...so...if a woman has an*l sex...then she's still a virgin (per medical)?

Hmm, interesting question. Per medical, maybe, but I don't know about mentally.

yeppers.

if a virgin is someone who hasn't had sex and you reserve the term 'sex' for 'clinton sex' then the trouble is that you can get sexually transmitted diseases when you aren't even having sex!

like how numerous teenagers each year get STDs from %#@&#! sex because they didn't know %#@&#! sex was sex and hence they should have used a condom if they wanted to do that (though unfortunately in the context of this board you aren't going to know what %#@&#! is anyway)

ROFLMAO

(though not about the teenagers of course

What does "per medical" mean? What resource is that?

I think there's hymen virginity (and for men, penis-in-vagina virginity), but there's the virginity that I think is more important, sexual knowledge through experience virginity. I remember someone asking in an email group or a message board once if she could still say she was a virgin, because she'd been raped. We told her yes, because, as I explained, she'd had sex used as a weapon, but not sex as it's meant to be. She isn't a physical virgin, but she doesn't have knowledge of sex. That doesn't mean sex that's pleasurable defines virginity; but I mean sex that's not forced.

So...you can say "anally" but not "an*l" here? ROFL!

On second thought, maybe nobody knows anymore, LOL!

there are a number of different definitions...

its interesting to figure out what it means to you...

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jennie said:
Rhapsody...so...if a woman has an*l sex...then she's still a virgin (per medical)?

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YES........... per medical! - for if she was to be checked by a medical doctor to verify her virginity - her hymen would still be in tack, therefore, she would be considered a virgin.

Well of course people can lose or rip their hymen by many means... horseback riding, etc... bicycle riding... etc...

And Alexandra K..... You do not think that Bill (Clinton) would enjoy anally enjoy rear entry of either kind? Now I can not speak for Monica either... or ... OMG... Hil.

Oh well had to ask.

I bet Bill would say yes...maybe either... never know.

well... if he had have enjoyed %#@&#! sex with monica do you think he still would have said 'i did not have sex with that woman'?

if so... then i guess %#@&#! sex isn't covered by the clinton definition...

maybe... you could send him an email and ask him??

ROFL

IMHO... it would be better to emphasise that these other acts are indeed sexual activity so people understand that they should protect themselves against sexually transmitted diseases when they are engaging in those activities.

there are quite a few teenagers who contract STD's already because they don't think of %#@&#! sex as sex hence they don't bother using a condom (well that and the silly notion that condoms are porous hence offer no protection hence you may as well not bother).

I think it's a good time to advise, male or female, if you ever ask someone if they're a virgin, whether it's because you want to be with them sexually, or for any other reason, you'd better let them know how you define it, ROFL!

It's just like cheating, although that's another topic. I forget the percentage, but some magazine did a poll of its male readers, and a large percentage said they don't consider it cheating to get a "happy ending" at a massage parlor! Guys and gals, you'd better write up a form clearly defining what you mean by cheating, and make sure your partner knows what will get them in trouble, LOL! If my guy got a "happy ending," I'd give him an ending, too, but it wouldn't be happy, ROFLMAO!!!

And, to the guys who took the poll, I want to know if they'd consider it cheating if their wives and girlfriends got a massage (especially from a sexy guy) and the masseur masturbated them. Funny how it's ok for guys but not girls, y'know?

That happy ending thing is I suppose the topping of the relaxation experience. :-) Roll the guy out. I love my massages ... have one every several years...like clockwork. haha. but that happy ending thing would blow...should I say that?.....my mind. I suppose it helps with the tip percentage...lol.

Not on my agenda for a massage though.

I wonder what Mr. Bill's email address is... what would his moniker....haha... would be?

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Maven said:
I think it's a good time to advise, male or female, if you ever ask someone if they're a virgin, whether it's because you want to be with them sexually, or for any other reason, you'd better let them know how you define it, ROFL!

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Per - Webster Dictionary:

Main Entry: vir·gin

Function: noun
Pronunciation: 'v&amp;r-j&amp;n
Etymology: Middle English, from Old French virgine, from Latin virgin-, virgo young woman, virgin

1 a : an unmarried woman devoted to religion b capitalized : VIRGO

2 a : an absolutely chaste young woman b : an unmarried girl or woman

3 capitalized : VIRGIN MARY

4 a : a person who has not had sexual intercourse b : a person who is inexperienced in a usually specified sphere of activity <a virgin in politics>

5 : a female animal that has never copulated


.... so to have any sex or to be knowledgeable of any sexual activity personally - you would NOT be a virgin.
but per medical you would be a virgin if you have not engaged in vaginal intercourse - broken your hymen.

On definition two: Yeah, a lot of virgins are most definitely CHASED...all over the place!

I'd like to weigh in on this conversation, now that it seems to have run it's course.

What it appears you are discussing is what is now considered, in this day and age, as "technical virginity." It means that technically, by legal definition, one is still a virgin if they have not had intercourse.

As you all noted, this hardly covers all that is going on with our young ppl today.

What I would like for you to think about is this: innnocence.

Keeping your sexual innocence until marriage is what is important, perhaps?

Since there are so many different sexual offerings that ppl are trying in becoming intimate, virginity is hardly the issue any more. Innocence is.

When you lose your sexual innocence you are no longer "pure" for marriage. If that's ok with you, then sobeit...but for those who are confused over the issue of whether or how much they can "do" and still be a virgin (technically)... then consider staying innocent.

Exactly....Sky..

those who are confused over the issue of whether or how much they can "do" and still be a virgin (technically)... then consider staying innocent.

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SecretGarden said:
Well of course people can lose or rip their hymen by many means...

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There is something so disturbing to me about the word hymen...