[thatcrazydyke]

When I was in my teens I believe I was a bisexual however I was very very wrong. I slept with 19 men from the age of 15 to 17. Within those I was raped by 9 of thoes men and molested in my sleep by 14. I had ...... Have a sex addiction and men are easy. I'm 19 now and have only slept with 5 women. I have already met the love of my life but things are very hard for us we are stuck living withy mother they are both mentality disabled and my mother used to abuse me. My bpd has been active and I'm wanting to get out. But I love her and never want to hurt her what do I do.

[Patagonia]

Ok so I have several issues I need cleared up regarding your post.
One is you said you were raped & molested by these men.
Was anything reported regarding these incidences? If you were under the age of 18 every single one could/should be documented. That's a lot.

But then in the next sentence you say you have a sex addiction....so I'm confused.

Were you raped or not?
There's a huge difference to be discussed.

So now you're 19 & have ONLY slept with 5 women.
Can I ask if you've been having protected sex? Have you done a full battery of STD testing since you've been sexually active?

Now you have someone you love & you feel "stuck" living with your mom.
Is that Bec you are the full time caretaker for your mom? Do you have an income where you can move out on your own? Does your mom abuse you now or is this from the past?
Is there some form of low income housing for your mom if she's on disability?

I'm confused.

Originally Posted by thatcrazydyke

When I was in my teens I believe I was a bisexual however I was very very wrong. I slept with 19 men from the age of 15 to 17. Within those I was raped by 9 of thoes men and molested in my sleep by 14. I had ...... Have a sex addiction and men are easy. I'm 19 now and have only slept with 5 women. I have already met the love of my life but things are very hard for us we are stuck living withy mother they are both mentality disabled and my mother used to abuse me. My bpd has been active and I'm wanting to get out. But I love her and never want to hurt her what do I do.

May I suggest take a break from sex, get some counseling and therapy, see a mental health specialist for meds, go see a general practioner for a check up, get a job, and then move out.

Oh yeah, send your mom cards or flowers every now and then.

[Patagonia]

Any answers....

[loveyouhun]

Hi,

I came out as lesbian in '94. I also have BPD. I'm finding it hard to have a relationship with anyone. I would like to have a relationship with women. I'm confuse where I am. I've had talk to therapists about it. More like it's up to me. I just can't figure it out.
I find it hard to have relationship. I get scare, and only had 1 night stand with a woman years ago. I enjoy it but I can't seem to find someone who will understand about my "pushing people away. I'm really craving to have special woman in my life. What do I do?

loveyouhun

[Finniky]

I think you should honestly take a complete break from relationships. I slept with 13 men and 2 women from the ages 14-16. Some of it was rather unwanted and "pushed" on me, however I allowed it in the end, so I don't consider it rape because of that. But I know what it feels like to feel used in the end. However I was molested in my sleep by 4 different people LOL! Yeah it's not funny, but I don't take it too seriously. I did the first time but after that it was just annoying.

We seem to have similar experiences in that regard. What I did was I dropped relationships and sex out of my life for 3 years (this break started at the end of my year being 16 and ended when I was almost 20). I did this to develop myself and personality on my own. It was quite nice, but I have to say it took balls since most people on that kind of path don't make a change like that. They just keep on keepin' on. I'd say I'm much more well rounded as a result.