Embarrassing

Yes, this is embarrassing. Well, I'm 23 years old and female, and I have a very high sex drive..I may also be addicted to pornography because of this. I have a fiance, so I never go out and do anything, but when I get this way, I get depressed because it's ALL day, pretty much When I do get depressed, I become suicidal and self harm. I also suffer with BDD (Body Dysmorphic Disorder, OCD) and I like to look at pornography and compare myself to it. Not only that, I get very obsessive with it. I can't say how much time I've wasted on it.
These urges and things can get painful, and I don't really know how to cope . I'm on medication, but it doesn't seem to be doing the trick.
I know there's nothing wrong with having a healthy drive and all, but this is getting bad.
Has anyone else gone through something along these lines?
Please don't judge me on this.

(((((((((((((((((((((summerflower22))))))))))))))))))))))))))

awe....no judging!!! no one judges here!!!!

i'm sorry you're going through such a rough experience.

i can't say i've been through the same...in fact i've never had sex....but i do self injure...we all have our issue here!!

have you been to a therapist? seeing a T might help you figure some of this out.....

does your fiance know about all this?

keep posting here and reaching out...i'm sure you'll find some folks who are in the same boat

feel free to send me a private message if you need someone to talk to

take care!!!

hi summerflower
oh no, it's not embarrassing, especially when others (like me) have passed through similar episodes.
I can remember I say my first porn at the age of 16 (when hormones rage) in presence of my mother (!!), after having had homosexual fantasies for more than three years. I became addicted at once, being interested in the dirtiest productions. Of course it was the degradation that I looked into them, a punishment for my miserable existence.
I needed 20 years of torture and several years of medication to be able to increase the self-esteem a bit and be able to get away from porn.

You are going through alot. Just stay with us, and talk with all of us when you feel everything bottling up inside.

summer, if this sexual compulsion is interfering with your life, causing you harm, and you're unable to stop, you could be looking at an addiction. A high sex drive and an interest in porn can be fine if it's not interfering with your life, health, or relationships. But if it's causing difficulties for you, you should speak to a therapist.

Cyran0