[asylumgardens]

I'm straight, but sometimes I've been curious about sex with a girl, but I could never imagine myself being in a real relationship with a girl, so I don't think that makes me a lesbian or even bisexual. Lately, though, I've become really close to a female friend that I also know has been curious about being with a girl sexually as well. I guess, since we've gotten closer I've developed a crush on her, though.. like a real crush that I would get on a guy. I can picture being with her sexually and romantically. I don't know what this means.. I am not about to tell her or anything, because that could really make things awkward and ruin our friendship, but I'm just very confused about it. I don't know.. is this normal or what can I do about it?

[tranquility]

Hi there,

I have had long relationships with both men and woman. I was with men first but kept getting attracted to women. So I had a 10 year relationship with a woman that ended 2 years ago. Now I have been interested in men again. I have decided I'm bi-sexual.

What you describe is very common with women. There are many women who become physically attracted to other women and it does not necessarily mean that you are gay or bi-sexual - you are just curious. It is not as common with men.

I would not stress over this. Just go with your feelings. If your curious that's okay - she may be curious too. If you dont' want to act on it that's okay too.

Tranq

[Raynaadi]

I had my first "girl crush" when I was in college. I was hanging out with this girl from one of my classes. She was an open lesbian. We talked about it and she called me "bi-curious" and said she didn't feel comfortable doing anything with me because she didn't want to take advantage.

Within the last year I had another female friend who never mentioned being gay but I picked up on it with her. We were great friends and I think that was partly what I was so attracted to, aside from the fact that she's really cute. A few months ago she moved to Cali and got into a relationship with a woman. I was almost jealous!

I think its definitely normal for us to be curious. I'm definitely all about men, but I do get attracted to girls sometimes, especially if we're good friends and I have a good connection with them.

[asylumgardens]

Thanks for your advice, both of you. I guess I'm just weirded out a little by it because I'm not just attracted to her physically but also mentally in a way I haven't been with other girls before. I'll just let it go, though, and not worry too much about it.

[Raynaadi]

I know for me, its hard to separate a connection from an attraction. I think we're attracted to people's minds and souls...so thats why I guess for me its normal if I find myself attracted to a girl, if she has qualities I like mentally.

[tranquility]

It's funny - my sister watched me in my relationship with the woman and finally said one day that she wishes she was lesbian because our relationship was so calm and nice. only problem is that she likes the penis

Tranq

[Raynaadi]

LOL! Yeah thats my problem too or I just might switch teams as well!