[Mara Mountain]

I have enough trouble controlling my thoughts during the day but I feel like it's better managed now. But I would like to know more about controlling your dreams or at least the frequency of them. I wake up many mornings after having a dream about my ex. I don't want to think about him because our past is very painful. It hurts in the morning and I don't want to get up. How I am now.

I would like more information on lucid dreaming is it? Does anyone know about this? I can't take these dreams anymore. He's out of my life he should be out of my mind too.

[Thunder Bow]

What kind of dreams? What is going today may be causeing you to rubber band into a memory of the past.

[Mara Mountain]

They're usually dreams that don't make sense. I could be baking cookies to my hair dresser and then she'll use them as shampoo or something. That's an example. But usually I have a weird dream where people of my past show up that I no longer talk to IRL. Being my ex. IRL we don't speak anymore but he's in my dreams every other night therefore first thing in the morning. I'm usually trying to get his attention somehow.

Originally Posted by Thunder Bow

What kind of dreams? What is going today may be causeing you to rubber band into a memory of the past.

[Thunder Bow]

Those people could be a part of your self that you are to incorporate into your self. Before, you were ignoring them.

[Meisjes]

For a number of years now I've been able to tell the threatening person/creature during the dream - you're not real, go away. They go away.

This started when I dreamt about someone being in my house. I was terrified of knives and he had a knife and a phone - telling me to find him inside the house. I woke up several times but returning to the same dream. Eventually in my dream I run outside and refuse to go back inside but it gave me a sense of escape which gave me time to think in my dream. I thought - is there really someone in the house? Is this real or is it just a dream. I recognized in my dream that I was dreaming, told myself this is just a dream and went back inside (in my dream), back to bed and slept till morning with no further nightmares.

The last time was a few weeks ago. Dreamt that a gila monster had come out from under a truck and was hissing at me. I woke up and thought that's not real, there are no gila monsters here. Back to sleep, told the gila - you're not real, go away. It went away. Immediately an exotic poisonous snake came to me over my bed. I woke up and thought - oh yeah the old snake dream, thats not real. Back to sleep I told the snake, you're not real, go away.It went away. Then dreamt that a man was up on my roof trying to find a way in. Without waking I realized that my roofline was way to high and steep for anyone to be walking around up there and told the guy, you're not real, go away. He went away - no more dreams for rest of the night.

After it happened the first time with the home intruder, I started telling myself what to say in a dream while still awake in the case of a nightmare. Especially when they were more often. Pretty cool to have the ability to change the direction of a dream while sleeping. Maybe someone here knows how to manage it on purpose - mine was more by accident so I don't know what part of the brain gets the message or what state of mind - trance happens to get a message like that.

[happiedasiy]

Dear Mara Moutain,

Remembering your dreams is not the same thing as lucid dreaming.
Sometimes when a person has been a huge part of your life and now he is nolonger there, he is there in your memories and therefore your dreams.

Also there are many times we think we have resolved matters of the past but truth is the past is still part of who we are today, an we need to embrace all the good with the bad and come to a place where we recognize the lessons learned. That is what your dreams are telling you, he keeps showing up means you have more to learn about that relationship before you can truely move forward. If there are unresolved painful emotions about this person your dreams might be warning you what behaviors of him hurt you and investigate before entering new relationships.

As for lucid dreaming, it takes alot of mindfulness to know when you are dreaming.
First you must be able to master thinking, thoughts, feelings, and action in life.

Then when you are aware that you are dreaming, it is important not to react, just watch. Do not respond emotionally or interact just watch.
Later let the dream playout, watch how you are being in this dream as well as others.

There are always clues to recognize when you are dreaming, yours is when you see your ex, you can calmly say I am dreaming. I wont be pulled one way or the other.
This takes time and while you are awake have an openview, be mindedful, and non reactive to your emotions.
These are some of the tools needed to be a lucid dreamer.
A lucid dreamer is one who is in control of their dreams.
Best wishes

[Thunder Bow]

Here in the Majave Desert we have big gila monsters. In May last year ,I saw one 18 inces long, it was a day glo yellow-green with black boltches on it. It had a forked tounge.

[THE16THDOCTOR]

A funny story abt my experience. (I laugh at it now picturing myself lol) I frequently have them that are just horrid. That I'm getting murdered raped etc. just bizarre things.
One time I was dating a girl and we were asleep and I had one. And it was so real I woke up sweating and rolled/fell out of bed talking. Hit my head of the radiator. I was fine and we laughed.

[Mara Mountain]

Thank you so much for that. I've been trying to figure out why he keeps popping up in the dreams. I understand that I have to investigate more what I didn't like from that relationship so I know what to look out for in the next relationship thank you so much!

Originally Posted by happiedasiy

Dear Mara Moutain,

Remembering your dreams is not the same thing as lucid dreaming.
Sometimes when a person has been a huge part of your life and now he is nolonger there, he is there in your memories and therefore your dreams.

Also there are many times we think we have resolved matters of the past but truth is the past is still part of who we are today, an we need to embrace all the good with the bad and come to a place where we recognize the lessons learned. That is what your dreams are telling you, he keeps showing up means you have more to learn about that relationship before you can truely move forward. If there are unresolved painful emotions about this person your dreams might be warning you what behaviors of him hurt you and investigate before entering new relationships.

As for lucid dreaming, it takes alot of mindfulness to know when you are dreaming.
First you must be able to master thinking, thoughts, feelings, and action in life.

Then when you are aware that you are dreaming, it is important not to react, just watch. Do not respond emotionally or interact just watch.
Later let the dream playout, watch how you are being in this dream as well as others.

There are always clues to recognize when you are dreaming, yours is when you see your ex, you can calmly say I am dreaming. I wont be pulled one way or the other.
This takes time and while you are awake have an openview, be mindedful, and non reactive to your emotions.
These are some of the tools needed to be a lucid dreamer.
A lucid dreamer is one who is in control of their dreams.
Best wishes