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#1
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I hate that I'm so stupid and clumsy. Today I dropped a bottle of soda and it spilled all over the floor.
Why am I so stupid? I've had people in the past get frustrated with me because I make so many mistakes. Eventually they accuse me of being stupid on purpose -- I must be because anyone else would have learned from her mistakes and avoid repeating them, but I keep repeating the same mistakes and get the same criticism. "How could you be so stupid and careless? Why aren't you trying harder? Stop crying. You have no right to cry because if you hadn't been so stupid, none of this would have happened." Even my parents, who, while well meaning, agree that if I were more careful and if I paid more attention, I wouldn't keep making the same mistakes. I know they're right. It's not like they're expecting me to have superhuman powers; they just want me to put in a little effort so I can function in real life. I want that too. But I guess I don't want it enough, because if I did truly want it, I wouldn't make so many stupid mistakes. I'm just so tired of always being blamed and scolded and criticized. I'm tired of failing. |
![]() AngstyLady, June55, Marla500, sadp8r, sickofscreaming, sike!
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![]() June55
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#2
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Tell us more specifics....we all drop things, make mistakes, sometimes cry for "no reason"-------you sound like you are feeling helpless in some way
What do you do? Work? School? Other? Could you be trying so hard that you are so self conscious you (literally) trip yourself up? Does anyone try to help/teach vs be critical? Have you fallen into playing the role you have been "assigned"?
__________________
"...don't say Home / the bones of that word mend slowly...' marie harris |
![]() sadp8r
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#3
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Being clumsy does not mean that you're stupid - some of us are just clumsier than others and that has nothing to do with intelligence. And who goes around saying the kind of things people have said to you - people are unbelievable sometimes!!! They sound like a bunch of jerks to me and you don't need people like that around you. Reading your post, another thought came to mind, sometimes clumsiness can be a sign of a real neurological problem so you may want to consider seeing doctor to make sure nothing else is going on with you. Other than that, all you can do is try your best. I also know it's a lot easier to believe the bad things people say about you, but that doesn't make them true. Believe in yourself first and foremost!
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![]() sadp8r, sike!
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![]() sike!
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#4
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We can't be perfect robots. I dropped a few sodas myself, not to mention a few other things. When you stop dropping things, then it is a time to worry.
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![]() sadp8r
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#5
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I grew up with other issues that I should just be able to do. "You don't try hard enough", "You can do it if you WANT to"... I heard it 100s of times literally.
I would want to go back in time and say this; "I tried, I did what I could and it came out wrong anyway. I am fully aware it did not turn out how it was meant to. Every time you point out my shortcomings, you are taking away from my soul. Why do you never tell me when I do something good? I grew up thinking I was lazy and hopeless and that I could overcome my issues by working and wanting. I didn't understand myself so I called myself names, as I had been told to do. You never offered me any help with my issues, all you could offer was negativity. I am good with some stuff, really bad at others. I wish I could have had encouragement for the good stuff, but I had to learn how to pat myself on the back. As for the bad... I'm still bad at it. Decades went by, your nagging didn't help me get better, it just added a sense of not being a real human because I cannot do "simple" things. Thanx mom, thanx dad. Ever wonder why I almost never visit?"
__________________
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![]() sadp8r, sike!, Silent_Efforts
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![]() Silent_Efforts
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#6
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![]() sadp8r
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#7
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Well, it seems that you have developed an pattern (albeit unconscious) of being clumsy because of always being scolded or put down and told you're stupid. I think if you started doing daily positive affirmations this might help. And tell those around you, friends and family, to try and be more positive towards you because it doesn't help you're psyche with all the negativity being thrown your way.
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![]() sadp8r
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#8
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Quote:
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![]() sadp8r
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![]() ToeJam
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#9
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Dropping a can of Soda is not the end of the world!
If you really are very inattentive and make constant errors/ mistakes, you may have ADHD or ADD, I suggest you read up on those. |
![]() sadp8r
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#10
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You're not stupid.....after my Mom passed when I was ten it seemed the harder I tried in school I had a difficult time memorizing what I studied...failed out of High School twice...all I ever heard from my dad and older brothers and teachers in high school in Brooklyn was that I was stupid and ill never amount to anything...dad eventually threw me out...I lived with relatives in western new York....I passed high school after 5 years....still was told I was stupid by dad and family...worked in warehouses mostly....but somehow never gave up...(well almost a few times)..but I survived....and pressed on....was even awarded 2011 new York state volunteer of year award .....no one is stupid...we all make mistakes...I do everyday....what the difference is tho is getting back up when we fall....a winner never wins until he/she made many mistakes....for that's what makes a winner when they never give up....You're smart for recognizing Your mistakes and as long Your heart still beats there's hope to press on....
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![]() sike!, unaluna
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![]() sike!, unaluna
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#11
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I can relate. All the criticsim and never being good enough.
Negative self talk is now a habbit for me. I'm good at that. It's not true though. Remember to give yourself praise and credit where and when it is needed. Would a friend call you stupid for the spilt water? What would a friend say or what would you tell someone else who spilled something? It's ok. It happens and can be cleaned up. And that is what happens. So ask yourself what would you tell someone in that situation? |
![]() sadp8r
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#12
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I think that you have heard that statement so much that you have come to truly believe it yourself. You are not stupid that's a LIE. Keep saying to yourself I AM WONDERFULLY AND FEARFULLY MADE! I AM SMART.
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![]() sadp8r
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