Does Facebook Hurt Self-Esteem?

Exactly. There aren't going to be many times when I care or need to know what someone had for lunch or what tv program they watched. Many people seem to think of FB as a streaming autobiography or as an arena of competition. If you use it that way then it may very well be a negative experience. You will likely come off as vain and petty or you may have a daily blows to your self esteem. It will be like being in high school forever... cool kids and losers
Also I think Kaliope had a good point. This is internal... more of a personal issue than a FB issue. Try to stop judging yourself by other people's standards. Or by your perception of their standards.

It seems that people who are complaining are not skilled users of FB. You can stop notifications, unfollow people etc. If you spend some time and effort customizing your experience, it will improve matters greatly.

Facebook did/does affect how I feel about myself yes. I never wanted it initally, but when people I met overseas wanted to keep contact with each other on there rather than write as I wanted to I decided to sign up. And then the downward spiral into the world of Facebook began. I got to the point about 4 months ago where I decided to deactivate my account. I have done that every now and again just to get myself off there when it gets me too down, and I don't have to get tempted by notifications as I would if all I did was log off. This time though instead of being a few days or a week it has lasted around 4 months, and on the few occasions I do log on- simply to look at photos of something I went to or contact someone, I find I instantly get depressed as soon as I start looking at people's posts. All that comes up on my wall is people in relationships, getting engaged, married, or having kids. It is insane how many people on my facebook fall under these catagories. Then there is me, single as I've always been, not fitting in with any of this, and feeling rather pathetic. I see guys I've liked with girls now. I have been trying to save to buy a house, then someone I know got given money to freaking buy one! Or people who are constantly depressing and wanting attention. Facebook isn't the place for it in my opinion.

It makes me so miserable and frustrated. And seeing people going out and doing things while I'm at home gets me miserable too. And all I would do is sit on facebook all day every day waiting for someone to talk to me.

It has become apparent that facebook does nothing for me. If people want to talk to me they have my number, they can call me. I exist outside of my computer.

Evening - you can disallow people to post on your wall. You have a lot of controls within Facebook that allow you to hit some middle ground between what you are describing and not having FB presence at all. I would say that in my experience 10% of people if not more disallow posts on their walls. They do so mostly for reasons of protecting personal brand, but you may use this option to protect your psyche from being further hurt by other people's display of luck and achievements.

I often feel awful after using Facebook. Intellectually, I can understand that people will always put their very best out there to see and that is the only side of peoples' lives I'm able to view. Emotionally, however, I feel like it is a never-ending beer commercial. All smiles, parties, bragging, awesome times that I completely missed out on. I have a love/hate relationship with Facebook. And, I might have an addiction to it, but that's another rant. In other words, ShyPoetGirl, I know how you feel.

I know, there are quite a number of people I've done that to. But then it starts to get excessive, especially when I could happily block half the people I have on facebook. The other issue is constantly missing what someone has said or done because I've blocked them, and people can start to pick up on the fact you have hidden them when they start to realise you're no longer responding to what they say, or they bring up a big event you've missed. I've almost been caught out a few times. I think there's more negative than positive for me when it comes to facebook. Even if I hid everything I didn't want to see I would still sit there waiting for someone to talk to me, or constantly check for notifications. It becomes too much of a necessity for me.

I see. I think you are making the right move then separating from FB altogether.

I can tell you that in my experience, nothing compares with pictures of cats in terms of the ability to garner as many likes as humanely possible in the shortest period of time.

I mean... I am witty and post interesting stories, opinions, etc., and they do get likes, but not as many as pictures of my cats. I have given up trying to compete with the popularity of my resident felines. Cats rule.

I think it can do. For me it just highlights how little my family care about each other. I have siblings, and we all live far apart but never is there any contact on there when I post something. I see friends posting pictures of their families or their achievements and their siblings making comments etc but that will never happen with my siblings. Like others have said though, customising is key. I learned how to unfollow the posts that make me most uncomfortable and now I hardly see anything on my wall apart from the people that actually matter.

Don't know about FB hurting self-esteem or not, but it can make you feel depressed at times. There was a couple of months about an year ago when I stopped checking my FB altogether, I was going through a low phase and the whole world seemed to be having fun and enjoying themselves and leading wonderful lives. It depressed me no end. But then, eventually I broke out of my shell and as things brightened in my personal life, the depression also went away by itself.

Sorry. I detest FB.

I think it has the potential for great harm.

I think that FB can work both ways. Sometimes it does make me feel less lonely, but then sometimes the loneliness can be amplified by it. I do believe it can hurt self esteem and spark feelings of "less than".

Facebook is an inaccurate representation of most of the users who use it. You're more likely to post a picture of you and your partner on your wedding day than you are to post a picture when you get divorced 5 years later...

Once a year rid your facebook of friends who aren't actually your friends. Others that annoy you on facebook but your are friends w/ you can simply unfollow them.

Self esteem is what one thinks of one's self and stuff "out there" shouldn't be able to shake your relationship with yourself. If I were hurt by anything on Facebook, I'd be curious about it and look at it to see what really was hurting me.

Hi Shy Poet,

I think that Facebook does hurt self esteem for those who are prone to feelings of rejection and/or jealousy, like me. I have only recently discovered the detrimental effects it's had on my hard-won confidence when I found myself, hours at a time, reading and re-reading posts from people, trying to analyze whether or not certain negative posts were directed at me (for example fat jokes etc. from my sister-in-law who knows I'm sensitive about my weight). I look at pages of old boyfriends and crushes and end up comparing myself to their recent partners and feeling like a loser. I see old friends living it up in Hollywood, making lots of money. Other friends have babies...my husband and I can't have children. People who I have had feelings for are flaunting their exciting partners and lifestyles. I do post stuff and it's largely ignored compared to others.

The worst part is posting something and being ignored, then someone else posting the exact same thing a few minutes later and getting tons of likes and comments. Like no one wants to acknowledge me at all. I don't feel like I'm obnoxious or overbearing. I don't really message people unless I have actual plans with them to confirm or something. I just end up wasting hours on there and coming away with largely nothing.

But the one good thing is it IS a way to stay in touch with people and updated on causes I care about. Even so, as of lately, I think I rather not know some of the stuff that's going on anyway. Hurts too much to not be included.

Anyone want to go on a week-long Facebook fast with me? I hope to last at least one day!

Do whatever it is that you need to do for your health :-)

Facebook isn't good for my mental health. Comparing myself to other people would remind me how crappy my life has been so far. I know this already, so there's no need to have facebook rub it in my face all the time. Also I can't be bothered creating a profile, I hate registering to websites and creating a profile. I use my phone to stay in touch and meet up with friends.

Also, if it makes you feel any better, I've seen profile pictures and these are always carefully chosen by people. They usually have good lighting, pretty makeup and show a good mood etc. For example my sister looks so much different in real life, I didn't recognize her at first when I saw her profile pic.

I feel the same way. It's boring, nobody really cares about anything we post, and it brings out narcissism in people. I deleted mine and don't really miss it.

My self esteem is pretty low right now for a variety of reasons. I find that facebook can make me feel better or worse. Like this morning, I posted something kind of controversial, and no one has commented on it. It makes me feel ignored. On the other hand, if people "like" stuff I post or comment on them, then it makes me feel better. Talk about fragile self image, I know! (speaking only about myself here)

It doesn't bother me so much what other people post that they're doing. Sometimes people's pictures make me feel less attractive though, but I think that's just a normal comparison?

I think it is true that Facebook does affect self-esteem. I know this as a fact because I've been on that end where, if I see a certain status or photo, I tend to feel worse about myself. I try not to use it much. I don't post because I don't feel like I have anything worthy to say. And I don't post 'selfies' because it'll make me seem vain. In a way, I'm very cautious about what I post. But if there's something I don't want to see, I hide it right away, unfollow or defriend.

People don't post photos of themselves crying or being hungover or having a crappy day at work…they're always having the time of their lives. It feels isolating for me to see everyone else so happy so I stopped going on Facebook.

As for everyone being beautiful, apparently studies have shown that people appear better-looking in groups.

http://www.psychologicalscience.org/...-do-apart.html
The Cheerleader Effect - Scientific American

I wonder why my friend take pictures with other friends and say how great their friends are and I don't get that from anyone. I feel like the dirty little secret. It makes me self concious about my weight. It's like they don't want people to know they have a 200 lb friend. I think I want to joint oa so I know people with similar struggles. My weight has yoyoed a lot. I think mood has a role in this.

Facebook does make me feel "behind" many times. especially when my friend brag about their achievements. Especially those that I am trying to succeed and can't. I stopped posting on Facebook my personal story long time ago.