Tragedy leaves strengths

I awoke thinking I might compile list of unwanted, unsought challenges, and the strengths I find myself with after I somehow get to the other side. Parts are in code or symbols to avoid triggering judgmental reactions.

First, quotes or near-quotes:
Here goes. Format:
Age
Comment
Strength

11 - 14 mo
walking delayed Not allowed near germy floor by orders of my Dad.
Deep struggles/frustration as needed to fight to get moving
Left now with frustration being a necessary part of motivation. No fun.

3 or 4 y.o.
Dad interrupts my use of simple tools because he felt awkward watching me try as a felt hander.
This left a hard-wired sense of near competence, and a quick inner shaming after even the smallest mistake.
Strength is I know about it and actively dispute that inner shamer. I also have an amazing drive for independence working alone. For the longest time I did not take criticism well. Still don't but may be able to pretend to listen a bit better.

12 y.o.
Finally master bike riding.
Deep seated embarrassment that my Dad didn't buy the right sized bike and I had to "grow" to the age of 12 to fit it.
Again, frustration is fired up, decided one Saturday that I "that was the day" I would master the bike. Took off the shameful training wheels and within an hour had it down.
Strength: Currently bike several times a week for transportation.

35 y.o.
3 time failure to pass first driver's license.
Strength is perseverance. There's also a hyper strength that causes trouble: taking on too much as a beginner. I wanted to learn on a stick shift, that was arranged. & pass my test on a stick ... the nerves I had at these test lead to 3 failures. This was a low point, and all of the screaming banshees of inner shame had a holiday. Took the 4th test on an automatic and passed. Oh, nearly 100% on the written ...
Note to self: keep it simple.

40 y.o.
Learn to swim
Strength: Perseverance, patience, self-teaching. It happened that as a child and later as a freshman in college I had some experiences with pools and swimming, terrified the whole time. Passed my college test (req. for graduation) totally on my back for 4 laps because I wanted to breathe whenever I wanted. Terrified, still.
It happened that my partner found an apartment for us when we had to move (I had to stay back with a job I was completing) with a pool in the basement. I took my time because I was alone with the water, so if I got into trouble there were no lifeguards (or Dads) to rescue me. Took 6 months simply practicing floating and breathing, floating and breathing, till I could keep that up for 10 minutes without touching the bottom or the sides in the deep end. When I KNEW I had the breathing timing down pat, I began to experiment with some strokes and lap swimming. Strength: time, taking care, and using the lesson from driving: keep it simple.

50 y.o.
The most depressed, sad, and grieving time of my life from a string of losses: my father died and left a hoarder's mess, lost my job, failed to secure unemployment due to too few working hours from dealing with my dad's stuff, lost my fortune in the market downturn, had to withdraw from joining a co-housing project due to a conflict with the 'alpha' male; my closest emotionally supportive friend's daughter died after a preventable fall from 2 stories; my friend withdrew into herself and away from our relationship, never to return; and probably more I can't remember. In the midst of this I faltered 3 different times professionally, so I felt I couldn't do nothing right.
Strengths: keep going 1-day-at-a-time, repeat daily. Drop all long range goals and live in the moment. Return to other things I loved that were closer at hand: improv acting, writing, reading, Reiki energy healing, taking long walks. Compassion for others in grief.

End of part I, to be continued.

an excellent practice~! well done,,, i know this will change the world for you~ i did it myself