[EvelyN02]

I'm generally a shy,introvert and a close persone around people but when I'm alone I feel different like I'm the real me.Even to my very best friend I don't show the very full real me.I feel like they all see only the windows of a shops and not the inside.I have heard many opinions that people have about me.I have a lot of insecurities that I'm trying to fix them.But I want to start show the real me more.I feel that all this image and the persone that I'm showing to others is holding me back to let go and enjoy things,say things.Throught the past years I think I have change a little but still I want to do something more.

Any ideas,help,opinion I would gladly accept it.

[puzzclar]

Welcome to PC!!!! (PC is PsychCentral) I feel very similar and have a few ideas. What are you afraid of if the people around you see the real you? This question is not easy to answer but very helpful in understanding the behavior that troubles you.

[Perna]

Hi, welcome to PsychCentral. I would first figure out how to articulate what the real you is like? Would you like people to see your sense of humor or that you like to read comic books or what? I have a wicked sense of humor with myself so I started talking out loud, arguing with myself at work :-) and amusing my coworker friends. Start to recognize and actually "do" little things that occur to you when you are with other people, make "that" comment, follow through on that urge to invite yourself along to something that sounds like fun or to invite someone to come with you somewhere, etc. Bring a book to work and read it during lunchtime and let people see what you're reading and tell them about it or, like we did at work, have Hearts tournaments with coworkers. Figure out ways to be yourself like you are when you are only with yourself. Transplant those thoughts and actions to when you are with others.

[McA1995]

I feel the same... I don't know who the real me is either though. It's like I've been this person for so long I've either forgotten who I was or I never really knew, I don't know. I remember my mam telling me that I used to be loud when I was younger, always did things my way, wasn't afraid to let people know exactly what was on my mind and always wanted to be the center of attention. I don't know when things changed or how. I always put it down to just being a part of growing up.
I've been trying new things the past 2 years or so to actually socialize with people again and not shy away. I joined a soccer team and the local group project, among other things. So far, things haven't changed much but I'm gonna keep at it. But you should totally try what Perna suggested. I think that would help.

This has been an issue for me to, I think recognising it is an important step.

No words of wisdom, just I know how you feel.

[electricrainbow]

I have been trying to find myself for at least 25 years. Been through 2 abusive relationships and now married where in the beginning my husband was very jealous, and now the last 10 years things have gotten better abit, I find it hard to think for myself, I had a best friend who was my backbone and she passed away 2 months ago, I think I know what to do to find me, its just fear thats stopping me because I dont put myself first, but I remeber tge advice of deceased friend and I keep moving forward, and thats what you need to do, dig deep and do some soul searching and it will come.. day by day things get a little better

[EvelyN02]

Thank you all for your messages!Sorry for my late reply.
I think I have found the reason and I'm trying to work on it.!