"Listening to Shame"

Many of us deal with shame for various reasons.
I do and it can effect my self-esteem.
Do you ever feel shame?

Here is a brief TEDTalk, given by Brene Brown, on "Listening to Shame:"

https://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brow...ening_to_shame

I hope this is helpful.


WC

Shame affects my self esteem as well. Thank you for this.

My son went into recovery for addiction six months ago. He agreed to check into a facility and then went into transition house. The facility asked him to try out for becoming a counselor and he made it into their program which gives on the job training, benefits and further education. The facility brought him up for me. They gave him a way of living, support, direction, a moral compass, company, food, shelter, and space to be himself. I didn't do this for him when he was growing up; I couldn't, and I wanted to with every part of me. I failed as the mom I wanted to be and succeeded as the mom he needed, by changing, and putting boundaries on what behavior I would accept, and by guiding him with love to this facility, and by remaining steadfast in my new way of supporting him. I have to let go of the imagined mom I wanted and never had, and tried to give my son. It is nice seeing my son as he is. I will have to find another healthier way to love myself as well.

I went to an estate planner yesterday to figure out how to structure my divorce settlement so it can go to my kids. My fiancé was there to do the same and to create a pool of money for the both of us. His old banking friends and the lawyer were looking at me, at their picture of me, and trying not to ask pointed questions about their friend wanting to have me in his life. I would like to learn how to step in front of the picture people have of me and say hello. I always sit there wondering if I am as awful and scary as they decide I am. I would really like to add a bit of the scary persona to my personality, like making friends with my shadow. I really swung the other way in life, of trying to be honest, kind, trustworthy, etc. How do I be okay with being human. I thirst for life, love and hugs. I am going towards my third marriage and was recently driving go-carts on the streets of Tokyo. Maybe I should make up my own definition of kind, trust worthy and honest because the one I thought the world wants doesn't let me have power or breathe or exist.