[Kelly3]

I'm sick of people saying "you should think more of yourself" and so on.
no, i shouldn't! I don't deserve to be thought of positively, by myself or others!
And it's all very well giving me a lecture on what i should and shouldn't be feeling, but guess what? I DON'T HAVE A CHOICE ABOUT HOW I FEEL OKAY?! The fact is, i feel like this, so stop telling me what to feel or not!
ARGH. sorry everyone, I don't mean to moan.. much.
It's like banging my head against a brick wall. but banging my head against a brick wall would hurt less.

*breathes* needed to get that off my chest. apologies.
wow, i sound like such an angry, horrible cow. Sorry.

Oh PS. the way to battle self esteem issues is to work on the problems causing it. - *shrugs* that's what i've been told anyway.

Best wishes,
Kelly. xxxxx

[sabby]

((((((((((((((((( Kelly3 ))))))))))))))))))))

Isn't it so hard to feel one way and feel like no one gives you validation about it???

So sorry you are not getting the validation you deserve. Your feelings are your own...no doubt about it. I think what may be happening is that folks are trying to help you work past those negative thoughts. Not because they don't want to validate you, but because they are trying to help you. Even if the help isn't really helping...they have their hearts in the right place.

Getting to the root of what causes you to have such negative feelings about yourself and your life is an important step in changing how you think and feel about yourself.

I hope you can find something good to think and feel about yourself really soon. One thing I can already see is that you care about other's feelings.....by your post....you show concern and compassion. That's a wonderful quality to have

Take good care of YOU Kelly3.


sabby

[Fuzzybear]

[(JD)]

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
I'm sick of people saying "you should think more of yourself" and so on.
no, i shouldn't! I don't deserve to be thought of positively, by myself or others!
And it's all very well giving me a lecture on what i should and shouldn't be feeling, but guess what? I DON'T HAVE A CHOICE ABOUT HOW I FEEL OKAY?! The fact is, i feel like this, so stop telling me what to feel or not!
ARGH. sorry everyone, I don't mean to moan.. much.
It's like banging my head against a brick wall. but banging my head against a brick wall would hurt less.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

I know this is not what you want to hear... but you are the ONLY one who has a choice about how you feel.

I'm sorry people are "shoulding" on you though. Perhaps the better word is NEED? You do need to begin to think better of yourself. If you are depressed, that can be nearly impossible "feeling" but it can be done...slowly, small steps.

You're a student! How great is that!! Can you fill in other good things about yourself in your profile?

Can you visit the 10 cognitive distortion post at the top of the Psychotherapy forum? It will help you begin to see how you can change how you feel, by working on the thinking aspect.

Begin with, yes, you can change how you feel. And if you aren't up to it right now, that's ok, just tell yourself that sometime in the future when you do ...you will.

(((((hugs)))))

[curley]

I really wonder why you say you dont have a choice about how you feel about yourself. I can not believe you have done things that are so bad that you would have such a low opinion of yourself! You are right though you do have a right to feel the way you do. I think it is very sad that you feel the way you do, but that is my opinion and i am entitled to it just as you are entitled to yours. People care about you and that is why they offer the advise they do. If you were not worth it they would not say it

[GiraffeBoy]

Hang in there, we all have our bad days. You're not alone with the self esteem issues. You're at the right place to find some help to deal with them, though. You've also got GREAT friends like Selfy to help you.