[Audrey19]

At school I tend to assert myself as much as possible...I can't have people thinking I'm weak (even though deep down I know I am)

My brothers call me weak and transparent all the time yet I always go out to try and prove them wrong...but it seems that everything I do isn't really noticed by anyone who matters most to me.

I wish I got the respect I deserved but I just don't...I feel like my self esteem was just spat on day in and day out. Now I'm paying for it

[pachyderm]

Join the club. It takes work, I think, to distinguish true strength from "weakness".

[bananasarecool]

this is my understanding.. so your trying to be assertive when your not, and people doint like it and they can see through it.
if you try to be overassertive people will.
so how about naturally building it up? i know it seems hard but when you reallise its working life'll be so much easier. start by just being prozac happy. think about all the good things youve got - friends, family, your appearance, your grades... then remember all the good times youve had. listen to feel good music. go out and shop..do anything to make you happy and hopefully naturally your confidence'll build and you wont need to pretend its already there.
its harder to stick up for yourself when your just finding it hard to carry on.
finally, make sure you can be assertive.. not agressive. cause then you really will pay for it.

am i right about what you mean?

x

[Audrey19]

Originally Posted by bananasarecool

this is my understanding.. so your trying to be assertive when your not, and people doint like it and they can see through it.
if you try to be overassertive people will.
so how about naturally building it up? i know it seems hard but when you reallise its working life'll be so much easier. start by just being prozac happy. think about all the good things youve got - friends, family, your appearance, your grades... then remember all the good times youve had. listen to feel good music. go out and shop..do anything to make you happy and hopefully naturally your confidence'll build and you wont need to pretend its already there.
its harder to stick up for yourself when your just finding it hard to carry on.
finally, make sure you can be assertive.. not agressive. cause then you really will pay for it.

am i right about what you mean?

x

Ah yes comrade you're right on with this. Building it up sounds good to me. Just hope that people will respect it when it comes to order.

[sunrise]

Originally Posted by Audrey19

My brothers call me weak and transparent all the time yet I always go out to try and prove them wrong...

I think being transparent is a good thing. I think there is a lot of energy expended pretending to be something we are not. How would it feel to be who you are instead of trying to prove something to your brothers?

I can't have people thinking I'm weak

What does that even mean? Why is it so important what others think? Are you sure people think you are weak? Is it so bad to be "weak"? What does weak mean to you--being nice, kindhearted, emotional, lacking in morality, easily tempted, conformist? What does it mean?

[Sannah]

Hi Audrey, you can respect yourself and respect others and if others chose not to respect you, you can learn how to deal with that too (ignoring them, leaving the area, etc.). You can respect yourself and never allow others to take that from you.