emotional and verbal abuse validation

Sannah,
Thank you again for your post. I wanted to be able to respond, but my brain was too stressed out to be able to put anything down. You were right about my wanting validation. Along with that, it seems like I would get an apology. But I also know that my parents are so good at denial (where did I learn it from,) that it is not going to happen. That is just something I am going to have to come to terms with. Thank you for reminding me that I don't need their approval! I don't have to please everyone, and I don't have to take care of everyone. I have been working on this slowly by trying and stopping from saying yes to everyone before they tell me what they want me to do, or before I actually think about it. I actually find myself (not as much any more but it does happen) saying yes to everyone before I even get a chance to think over what they are suggesting. I am working on my automatic response becoming, 'let me think about it' which then lets me decide. Instead of 'yes' which catches me into whatever they want before I think. Thank you for your reminder to keep that going.

Sanramon,
Thank you for your posts. Growing up I always wondered if I was the only one who went through what I went through. I am working through it slowly. It helps to know I'm not the only one.

Very Good Work!!!! This is exactly how I brought change about for myself. One step at a time with a plan. Very good for realizing that you can't change over night and that you still repeat the same habits sometimes automatically while slowly changing. This is good patience with yourself to allow (meaning not getting discouraged or beating yourself up for it) yourself to revert back to old habits while you are going through the process! Keep me updated on your work!