[Ardmore]

My mother has emotional abused me and my brother when we were children, she abuse me to the point that I was almost a lifeless human, but their were moments in life things were normal, but let me get to the point.

I set a this email saying: "Dear Mom

I'm sorry for everything.

I don't know if you can ever forgive me but I just want to get this off my chest, I feel homesick ever day, at times I just wished everything was back the way it was, I feel depressed all the time, I worried about school, home, and everything.
I feel overwhelmed almost all the time, I barley have anyone to talk to, when ever I talk to dad about it, I know he means well but he doesn't seem to understand why I feel this way, my life isn't bad but I feel overwhelmed all the time, I don't even have a family anymore all I have is dad, and Ethan right now.

I never see you and the fact you probably hate me at this point , and Danielle is shutting me out, treating me like I'm not even her little brother anymore.
Every time I think about this, I can't help but cry myself to sleep.

I hate myself for everything, I cause nothing but tension, Danielle already hates me but I'm not mad at her, if someone said the same things I said to you, I would react the same.
I feel as if I have no one beside me, I cry almost everyday knowing how badly I **** up my life, I failed in school since 1st grade, that is not something to be proud of, when people treat me like I'm Autistic, it just makes it worse.

I feel as though I'm losing myself, I want my Mother in my life and a Grandmother for my kids".



two days later she replied: "Marcus,

Yes of course I will and have forgiven you. I wish that things had not changed so much that you did not want to come and live with me. Danielle does not hate you, she just did not have the space or money to have you live there. I know that she did not want you sleeping out in the hallway rather than come into her place. She did not mind that at all. I want you to be happy and stop worrying about everything. I love you. Danielle loves you. We talk about you all the time and are wondering what is going on in your head and why do you think we hate you. You are my son. Danielle's sister and that will not change ever.

As far as you and I not seeing each other- well I have asked you and you showed no interest, so I did not ask again. I love you and miss you Marcus".

but what she has done to me and brother right now, I just don't know what to do.

[embracinglife]

I'm confused about this post. If she abused you badly as a child, why did you send her an e-mail asking her to forgive YOU? That doesn't make sense to me but maybe I am reading this wrong. She should be the one begging for your forgiveness.

[Ardmore]

Originally Posted by embracinglife

I'm confused about this post. If she abused you badly as a child, why did you send her an e-mail asking her to forgive YOU? That doesn't make sense to me but maybe I am reading this wrong. She should be the one begging for your forgiveness.

You see, last month I sent a email saying how much I hated her, but I can't deal with this anymore because of the email I sent, my sister forced me out of her home so I have to wait in the hallway of her apartment buliding just so I can go to school, I really didn't mean it what I said about being sorry, but I just wanted to make things right, but after she sent that email.

I'm not to sure what to think.

[Sannah]

So you sent the email to make things right but you didn't really feel what you wrote? And then your mom sends back a nice email and that is the part that is confusing?

[Ardmore]

Originally Posted by Sannah

So you sent the email to make things right but you didn't really feel what you wrote? And then your mom sends back a nice email and that is the part that is confusing?

I'm just as confused as you are I'm afraid.

[Leed]

Hi Marcus ~

How old are you hon? Why don't you go home? It sounds like your Mom misses you and wouldn't mind if you came home. She certainly loves you. If I were you, I would go home and try to get along with Mom.

Do you think that would be a good idea? Hugs, Lee

[Athens]

Hi Marcus,

Extremely abusive people are capable of sending nice and sweet messages from time to time. The fact that your mother retaliated when you expressed anger is disconcerting. Are you in high school or college? Can you get a therapist or talk to a councilor?

Best,
Athens

[Can't Stop Crying]

So sorry this is happening! Abusive parents can be very manipulating. Sounds like you are taking on the blame when you should be putting it back on her? I wish I had some great advice...hang in there!

[Ardmore]

Thank you for the support, it really means alot to me.

but my mother is only like that when she gets what she wants, last week she took my brothers bridge card and refused to give it back to him, she kept saying its hers and wouldn't give it back.

My brother has got in trouble with weed before (it wasn't his I might add) and last month I hear from him that she made him get her weed, and she perfectly knows well that he would've been sent to 9 months in jail if he got caught.

Leed:I'm 16 and I'm sorry but I disagree, she has made lame excuses for not wanting to see me, for example, on new years eve, she called me and ask me if I would like to spend time with her since I didn't see her on Christmas, so I said yes then she said she would call me 2marrow but she never did, then 4 weeks later I heard from my dad that the reason she didn't call me back that I needed my space, WTF.

Athens: I'm in high school right now, I'd prefer not to talk to one, because I've been through so many T's that its not even funny

Can't Stop Crying:Just simply give me support is enough advice for me, thank you very much

[Sannah]

Ardmore, sounds like your mom needs more help then you do (in other words, you have your head on straighter then she does).

[evaone]

Your still young, just a bit confused. im a mother too and the way i read the email of your mom it looks sincere that she misses you a lot. maybe your just too sensitive and what you always think is that your mom does not love you. as a mom i never feel that i have less love to any one of my children, they are all my life. try to go home.