 |
| FAQ/Help |
| Calendar |
| Search |
|
#1
May 03, 2011, 04:33 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
My name is Halen I'm 21 yrs. old and I'm desperately seeking for advice. I came to this site to try and find advice on what I should do about my anger. I have horrible anger issues, I throw objects across rooms, punch and kick walls,cars,pretty much whatever. When I try to control it I feel faint,weak, and shacky. I've seen a therapist before for it but it hasn't helped. As a child I experienced sexual abuse from a close family member, but have never told anyone. I find myself feeling emberrased and ashamed about it. It started when I was 7 and went on until I was around 11 1/2 (puberty.) I don't know if keeping all this in has anything to do with my anger because I feel like I have left that in the past, but recently I have found myself crying in the middle of the night for no reason and get panicky and kind of confused. I'm starting to fear that I will hurt someone do to my anger. I usually get verbally abusive with whoever I'm arguing with and rarely, but yet it has occurred, I get physical. I try very hard not to because I'm not the type of guy who hurts people but I just can't control it. Afterwards I cry out of frustration for not being able to control myself. I've used drugs in the past and I find myself being drawn back to them. It's always in my mind more and more. I feel like I'm about to totally loose control of my life now and I know that drugs are not the answer but yet it helped me fade out when I was younger. I want to be a good man but that just seems to be a far reality to me. I know I shouldn't blame myself for the abuse but I feel that I shouldn't of let it go on for so long.
I know that I would never be able to talk to anybody about it, I've tried before when I was at my lowest but just couldn't bring myself to say anything. I mean I'm a grown man who's scared of talking to people about my feelings and that is what is getting me into trouble. Anyway any type of advice/support would be greatly appreciated, I really need it right now. Thanks for your time. -Halen
__________________
Halen Last edited by turquoisesea; May 03, 2011 at 09:49 PM. Reason: trigger icon added |
|
#2
May 04, 2011, 12:02 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Hi Halen, people can get angry when their needs aren't getting met. If you were SA, your needs certainly weren't getting met. I really think that you need to talk to a therapist about this abuse so that you can heal and move beyond it and beyond your anger. Please keep me posted on how you are doing.
__________________
Don't let your problems or the world make you feel small. Stretch your arms out over your head. Take a deep breathe. Tell yourself that you are big. You are big, not small. You always have space, you are not trapped........ I'm an ISFJ |
 notablackbarbie
|
|
#3
May 04, 2011, 01:40 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
I'm so sorry you were abused as a child. I think if you had really left it in the past you wouldn't be feeling ashamed or embarrased about it. It sounds like deep down you know that it's still having a huge impact on your life. Which is completely normal. I hope you do try and find someone to talk to about this. You don't have to tell them straight away - you can get to know them, work on your anger issues and other day-to-day things. It takes time (sometimes a really long time) to get to the point where you can trust someone enough and feel ready to talk about this stuff. Please don't rule it out just because you tried before and couldn't say anything. Like Sannah said please keep us posted.
|
| Sannah
|
|
#4
May 04, 2011, 02:47 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Quote:
Secondly, i just wanted to let you know that I am sorry you went through what you did. You are being brave for being honest now. Try to find that one person in real life that you can connect to, to be more honest and open with, so they could support you more. It is hard and scary to be alone with so much anger, and no one else could possibly understand... There are times when i struggle with this too. What is nice about reaching out for help - that one other person that will listen and support you - is that they can be an outsider. In that they don't have to judge you or have any opinion of you yet because they don't KNOW you (as opposed to friends, family members, others in "your circle"). You can each work together in taking your time to get to know each other and look at the past and explore all the anger and maybe even redirect the anger in a safer way... ...Okay this ended up being really long. I dunno where you wanto start. Sorry.  (((Halen))) |
|
#5
May 05, 2011, 12:05 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
#$%?& computer ate mmy post
In my city there is a service for men only. It is a building with 2 floors and 4 general theapists and some experts. they have groups for everything,... self-esteem, anger , divorce, dependance etc. Maybe you could check into something like that. I am saddened by what happened to you as a child. children should be protected not abused. congrats on seeking help good luck roses ps even if you don't find anything, these forums are great |
| Reply |
This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
|
My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.
Linear Mode
