[Kmbpeace1171]

I am struggling with a few things most people I have felt safe enough to talk to about this have confirmed what I suspected and seem to "believe me" I find that absolutley healing and yet terrifing is that normal? I still fear being "in trouble" for talking like i'm a child DO you believe me, should I BELIEVE THis? is this all normal, I feel so messed UP seriously and I feel also likke people I have known a long time and trust who I have told I feel like I NEED to hear back from thnem a lot of support and love in their letters when I do open up to them its like I NEED them so much right now is that also normal? I feel so afriad of them leaving me at a time when I need them so much, life is so scary right now help

[mgran]

My ex recently opened up about having been sexually abused when he was a kid, and it really hit me how much I recognised it. He'd never said anything before, been terrified to face it I suppose, but I somehow knew that it was there in his history somewhere.

The fact is these feelings are horribly destructive... I think sometimes they can only be faced when we're in some sense "safe" (I know we never feel safe.)

It is so painful, so counter intuitive (how could someone do these things to a child?) and we'd often prefer to pretend they never happened. Yet... the problems bubble up, whether we acknowledge them or not. It is so appalling that we can't believe it ourselves half the time, no wonder we're scared that nobody else will believe us.

But these feelings will out, and we need to be prepared for it.

Hang tough. You can get through this. And even when you can't bear to look at it yourself, you can talk here, and someone will listen. I believe you.