I've always had relationships with women that went bad. Not friend-type relationships, but the relationship with older women like my mother, church leaders, mentors, etc. Its like I can do things for them, but they "drop" me if they find anything wrong with me. Well last week, I wrote this letter to encourage a woman who was a former pastor of our church. I openned up just a little to tell her how a book had impacted me and enclosed the book for her to read. Because of the past I just expected to get a blanket thank you at the best. Today I got this letter from her not just thanking me, but she openned up about her own struggle, and offered her email addy. I've never gotten anything so sweet in my life. I'm overcome with emotion that anyone would be as kind to me. Someone cares. I've never had that, and never felt like anyone has, but she offered it. I'm nervous for the future but there is a warm feeling inside, a little hope mixed with a little fear. I do feel cared for.
ev

[desirae]

That's really cool, she sounds great, and especially for you.

I'm happy your so happy.......happiness is contiguous around here.

Desirae

[Lexicon78]

This is wonderful. I hope all goes well with this relationship because you definitely deserve it!

(((((((((((((((((Esthersvirtue)))))))))))))))))))

I hope this relationship turns out to be a wonderful one for you!

so.... just an update...
the friendship with the woman isn't what i had hoped for. she stopped emailing back and didn't want to meet 4 coffee. i can't help feeling so stupid.

[lenjan]

Hey, EV? Two words: HER PROBLEM. Not yours. She probably feels weird about having been so open with you -- people get regretful about that sometimes and then stay away because they're embarrassed about what they said. I think you can be certain it wasn't you or anything you did or said. In fact, I'd say SHE'S the one who sucks at relationships!

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{ev}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

Candy

(((((((((tks candybear)))))))))

its just so painful...maybe cuz i have alot going on saw my mom, and brother this week.

[lenjan]

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{ev}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} boy, do I understand being disappoointed in people for the way they end up treating me when I think "it's going to be different this time."

I joke with my T about my "closet optimist." Sometimes this little guy pokes his head and whispers in my ear, "you know, maybe it's really not THAT bad....!"

Then I whack him over the head with a 2x4 and he goes away again .

I just want to be sure you don't beat yourself up or blame yourself for this. When people pull crap like this, I have learned from LONG experience, it has something to do with THEM, not you.

Hugs,
Candy