New here, desperate

I finally got some good news. The attorney who is working my contempt is taking my entire case! My abuser can't hurt us anymore!

I thank all of you for your continued support, it means the world to me.

I would still suggest reaching out to your local DV support center. They know the local laws and can have someone there with you and your attorney. I worked at a DV counseling center and we had advocates go to court with women even when they had attorneys. Local advocates also have a better time with police (at least some of the time). They can talk you through things also, and if nothing else, they can share in your frustrations about the legal system. It's crazy what people get away with. (hugs)

I have yet to hear from my attorney and I have left her messages.......

I was wrong, she is only to cover my contempt. The letter was poorly worded by the courthouse. Anyway, I was denied by legal aid because of someone trying to work too fast I assume. I got a form letter and called and was explained they had me down for a contempt case. They don't even do contempt cases. So I left the paralegal a message asking to call me back yesterday and of course she did not. Tomorrow I am asking for her supervisor....

If you want him off your back, you can simply say that you don't want the kids. Tell him he can have them. I guarantee you that he does not want those kids, and niether does his wife. He will try to play chicken, but don't be the one who flinches first.

No way, he'll take them just to spite me

If he had the kids, do you think he would abuse them? In other words, do you think he would hang himself if he had enough rope?

He would

If the abuse were recorded, or if the kids told on him (through questioning from a counselor), then he would go away forever. Overall, the kids (and you) might suffer less that way.

But I don't want it to go that far, they shouldn't have to go through it

Well, it's up to you. When I was a kid, I thought my dad was great, until he gained custody of me and abused me. He wasn't as bad as my mom, but I sure was disillusioned. He only agreed to take custody so he wouldn't have to pay child support anymore. Lord knows he did not want me in his house.

I was just thinking that the kids would eventually find out what he's like, and it might be easier to make it short and sharp. But you know in your own heart what you have to do. I guess there will be a lot of court appearances. If he does win custody though, make sure to be vigilant about signs of abuse, and get the kids back ASAP.

While I understand the point
Mysterious flyer is trying to make. I could never put my kids in a situation where I know there was even the slightest chance they could be abused. In my mind the end never justified the means when children are involved.

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My son understands who his dad is now, today he WANTED his dad's license to come up suspended when he realized why the cop was talking to him and into his radio. My daughter who is younger, she has known his game for about 2-3 years. Poor kids. My daughter is 7, and to have known his game for this long...... I am sad for them because he's trashed me hard today in front of them and there will be broken pieces of heart for me to mend Sunday because of him. I will fight to the end to keep them home.