Are body memories real?

Hey, friends.
So, it's been a while since I posted. I've pretty much...not completely (I waver a lot)... come to believe that I was abused and that my memories are real, despite the research of Elizabeth Loftus, FMSF, et al..

I feel like I had a body memory the other day, (if I am in correct understanding of body memories) I think I know the trigger. An actor (I can't remember his name) looks quite a bit like my uncle did. He was on TV, and I just got back from a weekend trip to the town in which everything supposedly happened. I think these triggered, on too of a topic we are covering in my English class.
So, for a college English class, this final paper on a book we read is super depressing; the paper I have to write. It's about memory, trauma, and forgetting. The main character forgets traumatic events of his childhood only to remember them much later in life.

This is the "body memory"- I'll write it in French to avoid triggering anyone. If you want to know the details, just use an online translator:
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J'ai marché vers ma voiture après j'ai ecris sur cet essai lugubre, sur la récupération des memoires et j'ai ce bâtiment angoisse en moi. Je ne peux pas arrêter de penser à si oui ou non mes memoires sont réels
Je continue à voir le visage de mon oncle mélangé avec le visage de cet acteur et les deux sont de type mélangeant ensemble.
Comme je suis le tri ce, je me sens comme il ya quelque chose en moi, comme un doigt ou un tampon à l'intérieur de mon vagin (mais je ne suis pas sur mon cycle menstruel). C'est absolument dégoûtant et inquiétant- mais je suis physiquement stimulé par ce-et je ne peux pas l'arrêter. J'ai ce sentiment chaud à l'intérieur de moi que je ne peux pas contrôler.
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This has happened a few other times, but not in such an intense way? Is this normal? Is this a body memory? Or just weird effects of anxiety?

This sounds like you could be having memories coming up from childhood sexual abuse by your uncle. If you have a T, it's important for you to discuss it with him/her. The English topic would be a very intense trigger. I've been having confusing memories about childhood abuse as well (not sexual). I don't want to believe the abuse happened and I get bad headaches when I think about it. This could be what you're going through.

Don't feel ashamed of the physical response, it's involuntary. If the sexual abuse did occur this would be a body memory of the "good" feelings. The body will react to stimulation whether we like the encounter or not. Women who are raped are horrified to report they had an orgasm during the rape.

TRIGGER WARNING FOR DETAILS



i have a similar body memory that is triggered when somebody rubs me the wrong way, shall we say. Im like, i KNOW that happened before! The intensity can be - well, what does happen when someone is not attuned to you? Its not pleasant.