[1980'sGothRockFiend]

Hi everybody, I just joined this site and so please forgive me if I'm not the best at using the forms yet. I'm having problems with my abuse history and I'm just wondering if anybody would be okay with a conversation about kidnapping or being abused and held hostage and the healing process of recovery. I trusted the wrong people and ended up being abused and taken advantage of. It happened last year but now I'm still dealing with extreme mood swings and panic. What's worse is that I feel like my friends, family and even my social workers don't believe me. Some have said hurtful things that make me feel stupid for having been so vulnerable that I could have let this happen. I feel like the symptoms that this trauma caused are only getting worse and worse, but I was so hopeful that time would heal me. I feel so alone. I worry that I'm going insane and that I'll be stuck this way, like a stranger to myself forever. Thanks for reading this and if you can please respond. Sincerely, Imogen

[ThisWayOut]

sorry you are feeling so dismissed. I've found at times people are in disbelief. I know at times I have felt like T didn't believe me over something, but it was actually her disbelief that someone could think about somethign liek that and then do it, not so much that she thought I was lying (I still have to double-check with her about it though. I think she must me sick of me constantly asking if she hates me and thinks I'm stupid)...
Share as much or as little as you like here. If you are worried it may be triggering, use the trigger code around what you write: [ trigger ] whatever you worry may be triggering [ / trigger ] (without the spaces in the code)...
Welcome to the forums. Hope they are helpful to you.

Welcome to PC!

I haven't been kidnapped, but I'm a survivor of medical torture. I've seen people not believe me or excuse my abusers. It even happened here on PC once.

[1980'sGothRockFiend]

Thanks for your response, and also your guidance with the "trigger code" and advice on how to use the forums. I'm a newbie

I'm sorry that you feel so dismissed. I relate to your feelings of anxiety that other people that we've opened up to about our trauma history might resent us or dislike us. I hate how trauma can be so intense and yet so brief in the mix of all the time that is life. The long lasting effects are the worst.
I'm worried that my husband hates me, because he wasn't there when I was "kidnapped" and he waffles between reactions of either believing me (but also putting me down for making such a stupid choice to trust strangers) or choosing that I must have made the whole thing up for attention.
It hurts when the people in my life make me feel like they dislike me, and not dislike the things that have happened to me.
Well, I guess that's what finally drove me to these forums.

[Fuzzybear]

you can pm me anytime. i have deep seeded trauma and i am able to speak about it without getting triggered - it's beneficial to me to speak about it anyway. ...sorry if it seems like i'm following you around on the forums, i just feel like we could be good friends. ahahah... i'm sorry, i'm not really creepy, i sware.

also - i feel like from what i've read you've posted so far, i can relate to some things you have spoke about. anyway, i feel like i'm being a weirdo so i will leave you alone and let you pursue the conversation if you want to... hahaha. :hides under the table: