[Superheroine]

I'm so tired all the time. My walls are always up, the mask always on. Can't trust anyone - every time I do it bites me in the *****. The new/interim T asked me where I saw myself in 5 years... I had to laugh. I said, "Good question, dead." I can barely see past next month, let alone 5 years. I certainly can't see myself living like this for 5 years. I want out.

[czarina1984]

I've been in that position for a long time. Living one day to the next is horrible but you want me to think about the future and how empty and hopeless that is too? How is that helpful?

Just keep doing the day to day thing and even hour by hour if you need to. Eventually things start to open up and the pain gets a little less and easier to manage. Don't give up.

[Frankbtl]

Hi Superheroine,

I'm so sorry you're struggling so much
But I do have to say that it's real good that you managed to let that mask drop enough in answering that question so truthfully about your feelings to your T, kudos to you!!!
Hopefully they're going to be able to use that as a good baseline to be able to start helping you.............
And hopefully you won't have to spend the next five years feeling like you do right now, you are reaching out for more support and that has to be a good thing with what you're going through
And yes, absolutely agree with the suggestion of one day at a time, if you need to see it that way right now. And enough "one day's" can lead to "brighter" days with the right help and support.........

The trust bit..........well for now I'm real glad you've managed to lower the mask and trust us with some of the things going on for you, thankyou and I hope we can help a little on your road through all of this
As for being let down by other people.......I'm really sorry that has happened for you, it must have been real tough ........but we're here as a "sounding board"/for support too if you're unsure of whether or how to trust specific people or in relation to trust in general, and maybe between us we can help towards you feeling able to trust or not trust specific people...........
But if you want to talk more............



Alison