[it'sgrowtime]

So I don't commit any avenging acts...I'm going to write here instead. Just saw my daughter's abuser while driving. He was driving. At first I felt nothing..but then my blood started boiling and I felt like a calm maniac. I drove around awhile so I could flip him off and call him a loser. Didn't see him though. I don't know what I would do if I came across him when we're walking. I think I would go primal and start yelling, "molester! Loser! That guy is an abuser! Why is he working down here!" I hate him and I want to crush him and expose him to others, but I don't want to expose my daughter at the same time. The police were willing to nail him but freaking case law makes it too difficult. No evidence. And he'd get a slap on the hand but at least lose the jobs he has where he works around kids and the disabled community.
How will my family continue to enjoy areas of town that he occasionally goes to?? I want to chase him off. He is such a passive aggressive lying freak and my sick mother is still with him. I want so badly to punish him.

[Amyjay]

oh that must be very hard. My abuser was also allowed to walk free without charge. I hear your anger.

[Ripdlc]

I absolutely get it! Your mother should be ashamed of herself! IMHO, she is guilty too! I've been in the same situation as you. I have a bad temper anyway...it seems like the abusers have more rights than the survivors. I'm sorry for you and your daughter, hon. I wish there was more I could say. My hope is that somehow he is exposed for who and what he is...if he ever does get locked up..trust me he won't survive.
{{hugs}}

[it'sgrowtime]

Originally Posted by Ripdlc

Your mother should be ashamed of herself! IMHO, she is guilty too! I've been in the same situation as you. I have a bad temper anyway...it seems like the abusers have more rights than the survivors. I'm sorry for you and your daughter, hon. I wish there was more I could say. My hope is that somehow he is exposed for who and what he is...if he ever does get locked up..trust me he won't survive.
{{hugs}}

Thank you! Ooooh I could just rip him to pieces with my bare hands. My mom should be ashamed of herself...though I think lifelong shame is what makes her this way. But you're right, she is guilty too. She "turned" when she worried no one would believe she didn't know. I haven't been able to fully feel my anger towards her yet...because I've felt glimpses of it, and it's nuclear level. They give me a really bad temper
Thank you for your post. It helps

[it'sgrowtime]

Originally Posted by Amyjay

oh that must be very hard. My abuser was also allowed to walk free without charge. I hear your anger.

I'm so sorry, Amyjay. It's not right! You deserve better. I hope you don't have to see the person ever.

[nicoleflynn]

Don't say or do anything to him; abusers are dangerous. I know how hard that is.

[it'sgrowtime]

Originally Posted by nicoleflynn

Don't say or do anything to him; abusers are dangerous. I know how hard that is.

You're right. i don't want to be afraid of him, but he is likely dangerous.

[Onward2wards]

It is incredibly hard when people who knowingly do wrong get to walk away whistling happily and others are left to pick up the wreckage they leave behind. I feel your pain.

Things that we can do about it, off the top of my head:

* Make sure we are aware of people's red flag behaviors in future.
* Warn others about abusive behaviors. Some people volunteer to talk to the public about various kinds of abuse, for example.
* Something that helps me - for every painful thing I experience or see others experience, I go out of my way to make a difference in someone's day and try to take better care of myself.
* Talk to people in the political and legal system when it seems to be sleeping on the job. Procedures can be improved.
* Talk with a counselor and other people who have experienced similar situations. Going through anything alone can be difficult.

[it'sgrowtime]

Originally Posted by Onward2wards

It is incredibly hard when people who knowingly do wrong get to walk away whistling happily and others are left to pick up the wreckage they leave behind. I feel your pain.

Things that we can do about it, off the top of my head:

* Make sure we are aware of people's red flag behaviors in future.
* Warn others about abusive behaviors. Some people volunteer to talk to the public about various kinds of abuse, for example.
* Something that helps me - for every painful thing I experience or see others experience, I go out of my way to make a difference in someone's day and try to take better care of myself.
* Talk to people in the political and legal system when it seems to be sleeping on the job. Procedures can be improved.
* Talk with a counselor and other people who have experienced similar situations. Going through anything alone can be difficult.

Excellent suggestions. I will take them to heart. Thank u