When your partner doesn't let you cut your hair?

I'm sorry that happened to you, love. I had the same experience. As a female, it was hair,nails,makeup, clothing, footwear. Lord have mercy it was triring. Her'es a hug for you.

Hi, just my two cents. I have the same sort of experiences with my fiance. It was always about controlling what I do. I remember once he made Tacos, and I wanted to eat the meat and mix it with rice rather than having it in shells.

He likened it to "well would you just make a pizza and eat only the cheese"? He said I could eat it like that, but he would NEVER make them again because I ate it like that.

It's about controlling your partner and making them feel poorly for certain decisions. There is nothing wrong with having a preference. They want to make you feel like there is a problem to control you and make you feel poorly.

That's exactly what my wife said, that I looked like a little boy who just got forced to have his hair cut. She'd pick out clothing for me. She'd critique what I wore. I feel even more free to ignore her now that we don't live together.

Here's the good part: to some extent, it's a great idea to have a partner who can provide pointers as to improving your look, and can do so in a way that's fun, not critical, and supportive.

Here's the bad part: If she's sulking and giving you the cold shoulder because you didn't do it her way, what else would she have done that with? Moving next door to her parents? Moving to Tierra del Fuego? Robbing a bank? Having 14 kids? Having broccoli for dinner? I don't cutting off communication or closeness in the relationship is healthy at all. It's certainly manipulation and it isn't the act of a loving spouse.

My husband, boyfriend at the time, would "tease" me when I tried to wear makeup. He would say things like you look like you've been playing with crayons or did you get into your mother's makeup again. It stung to hear these things and I eventually quit even attempting to wear makeup because it made me feel stupid. Looking back at this now, I feel like this was done with the intent to make me feel like I wasn't good enough of a woman because I couldn't even properly apply makeup. I can't fathom what other motive he would have for telling me these things.

So, not exactly the same thing, but I think trying to control your appearance in the way she did it is abusive. A non-abusive person, would just tell you that they prefer your hair a different way, and that's a perfectly reasonable thing to say to your partner, I think. They wouldn't belittle you.

She also tried to control what I wore by sulking if I had a shirt on for example that she didn't like.

She used to buy me clothes a lot of the time and I think that was her passive aggressive way of trying to control my wardrobe.

Never let anyone control you.

They simply aren't worth it and it is also against the law.

She has a right to express her opinion & you have the right to ignore it.

My first husband got angry at me once when I cut my hair and didn't ask his permission first. He said "opinion," but our dynamics being what they were, he meant "permission."

If I wanted to cut it now, I would merely tell my husband I'm going to. Or, I'd just do it. He knows it's my hair. He wouldn't say a word.

I think the ex-girlfriend's reaction was way over the top. No partner should dictate to the other what style choices they make.

My hubby always tells me that I don't need to wear make up because I look much better without it.

IMO he's entitled to his opinion, but something is off if you want to wear it, and he *forbids* you to. It should be your choice.