Home Menu

Menu


Reply
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old Mar 09, 2008, 03:26 PM
Kiya's Avatar
Kiya Kiya is offline
Legendary
 
Member Since: Oct 2007
Location: Out of my mind...back in 5 min.
Posts: 10,370
stuff is slowly surfacing, like those long funny worms after a rain.
i can't remember being 6-7. i have a clear picture of 5 and it feels older than 6. i can't find 6 or 7. the next clear thing i can find is 11. and yet 11 is a whole-nother-ballgame. i just posted about it in "remembering pieces" yesterday.
so it is like 6 is struggling to be present, and so is 11 and it confuses me. who am i? am i 6? am i 11? or am i in my 30's?
how can i be all these at the same time?
i want to curl up in a ball and hide in my closet. i want to run from the coming danger. and i am typing here safe in my room with a rehearsal coming up soon that i need to be fully present for.
__________________
Credits: ChildlikeEmpress and Pseudonym for this lovely image.



poss trigalt="Universal Life Church | ULC" border="0">

advertisement
  #2  
Old Mar 09, 2008, 04:10 PM
bchlyn's Avatar
bchlyn bchlyn is offline
Poohbah
 
Member Since: Dec 2007
Posts: 1,162
kiya... i think that we revisit those times ... i use to think that the part of me from back then didn't survive... that she had died... but i am finding that maybe she was just hiding in the closet... i know it's different for you in some ways... but kind of the same too... lyn
__________________
lyn
one could do worse then be a swinger of birches.
~robert frost~
  #3  
Old Mar 10, 2008, 01:53 AM
Kiya's Avatar
Kiya Kiya is offline
Legendary
 
Member Since: Oct 2007
Location: Out of my mind...back in 5 min.
Posts: 10,370
yeah - that makes sense, lyn.... i think we probably were hiding in our closets, wishing and praying we were dead -rather than being with our bodies as bad things happened.
__________________
Credits: ChildlikeEmpress and Pseudonym for this lovely image.



poss trigalt="Universal Life Church | ULC" border="0">
  #4  
Old Mar 10, 2008, 07:22 AM
bchlyn's Avatar
bchlyn bchlyn is offline
Poohbah
 
Member Since: Dec 2007
Posts: 1,162
maybe it's time to step out of the closet... it only holds the illusion of safety anyway...lyn
__________________
lyn
one could do worse then be a swinger of birches.
~robert frost~
  #5  
Old Mar 11, 2008, 01:10 AM
Kiya's Avatar
Kiya Kiya is offline
Legendary
 
Member Since: Oct 2007
Location: Out of my mind...back in 5 min.
Posts: 10,370
*sigh* =( you're right. i don't want this to be right. but i think it is.
well - real closets to me were (are) always scary. but my inner closet feels safer than being exposed. yet the memories find me anyway. t doesn't want me to go through them alone anymore. that felt like solid ground.
i'm ready for solid ground.
__________________
Credits: ChildlikeEmpress and Pseudonym for this lovely image.



poss trigalt="Universal Life Church | ULC" border="0">
  #6  
Old Mar 11, 2008, 06:23 AM
bchlyn's Avatar
bchlyn bchlyn is offline
Poohbah
 
Member Since: Dec 2007
Posts: 1,162
yeah i hear that... seems we always hide in the places that aren't so safe...huh? i am glad you don't have to do it alone anymore... you deserve to be cared about...lyn
__________________
lyn
one could do worse then be a swinger of birches.
~robert frost~
  #7  
Old Mar 11, 2008, 12:30 PM
Kiya's Avatar
Kiya Kiya is offline
Legendary
 
Member Since: Oct 2007
Location: Out of my mind...back in 5 min.
Posts: 10,370
as do you deserve to be cared about.... more though, I think (for myself) is that I have to let myself be cared about.... that's kinda scary.
Hoping today goes better for you!
Kiya
__________________
Credits: ChildlikeEmpress and Pseudonym for this lovely image.



poss trigalt="Universal Life Church | ULC" border="0">
  #8  
Old Mar 11, 2008, 04:17 PM
Fuzzybear's Avatar
Fuzzybear Fuzzybear is offline
Wisest Elder Ever
 
Member Since: Nov 2002
Location: Cave.
Posts: 96,622
(((((((( kiya ))))))))
__________________
  #9  
Old Mar 12, 2008, 11:47 PM
sujunew's Avatar
sujunew sujunew is offline
Grand Member
 
Member Since: Feb 2006
Posts: 941
(((((kiya)))))
this soundsl ike a really scary place to be right now, and I can certainly relate to feeling like your 'inner closet' is the safest place to be. But it sounds like you are ready to take that next step in healing. I wish you all the best.
__________________
I know that behind every grey cloud there is a silver lining; I just need to be patient enough to find it!!!

  #10  
Old Mar 13, 2008, 02:31 PM
Kiya's Avatar
Kiya Kiya is offline
Legendary
 
Member Since: Oct 2007
Location: Out of my mind...back in 5 min.
Posts: 10,370
(((((((( fuzzy, sujunew )))))))

thanks... yeah... i think i am ready to move forward.... it feels like walking to the gallows and i'm shaking like a leaf.
kiya
__________________
Credits: ChildlikeEmpress and Pseudonym for this lovely image.



poss trigalt="Universal Life Church | ULC" border="0">
  #11  
Old Mar 14, 2008, 01:13 AM
BalishBun's Avatar
BalishBun BalishBun is offline
Grand Poohbah
 
Member Since: Jan 2008
Location: Michigan
Posts: 1,840
aww well i hope things improve. good luck
__________________
Do not stand at my grave and weep; I am not there. I do not sleep. I am a thousand winds that blow. I am the diamond glints on snow. I am the sunlight on ripened grain. I am the gentle autumn's rain. When you awaken in the morning's hush, I am the swift uplifting rush of quiet birds in circled flight. I am the soft stars that shine at night. Do not stand at my grave and cry; I am not there, I did not die. R.I.P. Bandit 7-12-08 I love you I miss you.
  #12  
Old Mar 14, 2008, 05:08 PM
Kiya's Avatar
Kiya Kiya is offline
Legendary
 
Member Since: Oct 2007
Location: Out of my mind...back in 5 min.
Posts: 10,370
ty =)
__________________
Credits: ChildlikeEmpress and Pseudonym for this lovely image.



poss trigalt="Universal Life Church | ULC" border="0">
Reply
Views: 1248

attentionThis is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.



Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
maybe this one will stay up....(poss trig) lenjan Self Injury 12 Jul 04, 2008 08:42 PM
Emotions [poss. trig] Griffe Post-traumatic Stress 3 Jul 01, 2008 07:43 PM
lost....help? poss trig. HALLIEBETH87 Anxiety, Panic and Phobias 8 Apr 18, 2006 09:45 PM
Do we ever get over it? (poss trig) Post-traumatic Stress 17 Jun 29, 2005 09:46 PM


All times are GMT -5. The time now is 09:09 PM.
Powered by vBulletin® — Copyright © 2000 - 2025, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.




 

My Support Forums

My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.

 

Helplines and Lifelines

The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider.

Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here.