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#1
Jun 11, 2008, 09:28 PM
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Triggering... from me.. "freeatlast" an alter of freewill's...
I love you so very much.... I will always love you... you will always be my sister.. the person that I wanted to love me more than any other person in the world - in the midst of all of the abuse in our family... it is you.. that I wanted to have love me... my sister.... I loved you so much....that.... I wanted to take a branding iron... and shear my heart.. taking away the sweetness.. that was me.. that is me yet today... you taught me so very well.. my older sister.. that being "sweet" being "loving" being "kind" was a disease... my young alters asked the body work therapist... if being sweet... was a disease.. they were so very serious... because they thought it was something like the "measles"... something they caught... something very bad... something that "hurt" other people.. that they could pass onto other people like the "plague".. Yes.. that is what you taught me so well... being sweet.. is having "the plague"... It is my most basic personality... it is me... I am me.. and can no more stop being sweet.. than stop breathing... There isn't anything to forgive...I wish there were... I wish I could say "I forgive you"... You were a child... your hurting me... your touching me in bed... it was learned... and not something that was "you" that meaness..that nasty... cutting.. person...that was you... I wish I could say "I forgive you"... because it would make my terrible sadness and pain away.. you see,, my pain.. and my sadness are for you, my sister...also an abused child... and a hurting adult person... one who hates... and is nasty, cutting, destroying of others to convey the great pain in your heart... today... I accepted the sweetness.. that is me... and I no longer want to "burn" it out of my heart.. with the heat of the branding iron... I no longer have "the plague"... (((((((freeatlast)))))) to live the remainder of my days... as who I am... a sweet, kind loving person... I hope.. someday... the sadness will pass.... |
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#2
Jun 12, 2008, 12:34 PM
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(((freeatlast)))
__________________
花鳥風月
c'est tout ce que j'aime |
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#3
Jun 12, 2008, 09:12 PM
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sorry you're hurting babe!
(((((((((all))))))))))
__________________
Credits: ChildlikeEmpress and Pseudonym for this lovely image.   alt="Universal Life Church | ULC" border="0">
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#4
Jun 13, 2008, 04:25 AM
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(((((((((((((((((freeatlast)))))))))))))))))))
my loveandcare always my friend, holding your hand.....Kerry xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxxo  
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