Bf is too big for me :/

Anyone ever been in this situation? I've been with him for a while and we have had sex a handful of times- I'm really small and he's rather big. I have to cut the act short or encourage him to finish bc it reall hurts me. After, it burns and I feel like I'm all beat up! I want to like it but I think maybe we just aren't compatable. Any suggestions? I want to be a good lover and I also want to enjoy it!

I don't know of a to fix your situation. Have you tried using lubicants? I've been in a similar situation and it was tough. I would be sore for days. I wish I could help with solution, but I can't.

Have u guys tried perennial massage. It is used normally in child birth by a mid wife to avoid tears when having a baby. It requires massage and stretching gently of the perennial area. I have a feeling it might be kinda fun to, if done by your partner. I will spare you the details, unless I have further questions or need to give that info. Just google perennial massage.

I used to have that problem with my current husband. It turned out I had a significantly tipped uterus that was causing the problems. We used different angles with less penetration until my uterus was fixed.

If girth is the issue I'd recommend lots of lube and taking it slow at first. The most important thing would be to relax, although I understand it can be difficult when you're anticipating pain.

I have been in this situation. Actually to the point where I, like you, am pretty sure it's more my issue than the other way around. Being relaxed is really the way to go. Along with successful communication, sometimes a sense of humor, feeling comfortable enough with the person to stop as soon as it gets the slightest bit uncomfortable OR ceases being pleasurable- that is your body giving you a warning. You need to heed that, because the more times you end up with pain after sex, the stronger the association becomes between the two, the more you expect that it will be painful, the more difficult it will be to relax, the more likely that it will be at least uncomfortable... see where I'm going?

It can be a difficult cycle to break, but really not at all impossible. You are likely going to have to talk about specifics and use specific terminology. And that's ok. It's how you build trust and strengthen communication.

Also- lubrication is a definite yes.

If you use water-based lubrication, you may have to reapply in the middle of intercourse, and that will be a more likely situation the first few times you use it because you may still have the association with discomfort. This could be awkward, but doesn't have to be.

If you use silicon based lubricant, they really don't dissipate but you need soap to clean them up.

I would recommend not using any of the crazy hot/cold/tingly/whatever lubricants. They will send your body weird signals and you won't be able to tell if you are getting any warning signs.

Um... I feel like I'm preaching.
I don't know if you do or don't use any of this stuff, just figured it might be helpful for whoever reads it.