[BoredMommy]

I love my husband, he's a lovely and caring man but sometimes he can be so boring in bed. Last night when we had sex, he ejaculated after 5 minutes, he always was able to go for hours, even a year ago he could make me orgasm easily, now i have to finger myself to orgasm and have him lick down there to help. It just has become so bad and is making me low, I wonder maybe since I put weight on has he gone off me. He works in an office with lots of women dressed smart and looking pretty, maybe he prefers them.

[Travelinglady]

Hi, BoredMommy, and welcome to Psych Central! It difficult to say what's happening with him. I know it might be tough, but maybe it would be good to try to talk to him about it--not trying to make him feel defensive, though. And even to ask him if he is feeling less attracted to you.

Could he just be tired from working too hard?

[Fuzzybear]

Welcome to pc

[gayleggg]

You don't mention your ages but it could be medical as well. Just a though.

[BoredMommy]

I guess, funny how a problem can bother you and then it passes over.

[ididwhat?]

As difficult as it may be for you... talk to him about it. If my husband was bored sexually with me and didn't let me know, how could I know? I wouldn't even have the opportunity to spice things up if he said nothing. Talk to him.

[Pikku Myy]

hmnnnnnnn.......... maybe he is just too stressed out. Sometimes that has a lot to do with spontaneity? Just a thought............

[buzz bee]

Being open is so hard. Expressing how you feel and what you want without hurting the other person is for the birds.

What I did is I texted him. I told him what I wanted to try. Sandwich it. For example " like really liked the thing that you did with your hand last night." Then follow with "how would you feel if I bought a ------- and we tried that".

Spice it up. Dont worry about how embarrass it makes you, if it helps then yeah!!!! Look on line at Adam and Eve or some place like that. Look together. Or go to a toy store together. Trust me when I tell you that the other people in there are looking for the same type of spice. And the sales people have tried most of it themselves. Even my husband has found a toy he likes.
( I used to sell After Dark and I did not feel one bit ashamed helping those ladies out. Its a product and I wanted to help them. Even a few friends have asked advise from me every so often.)

This has help a lot in my bedroom. The hard part is trying to get the shyness to go away. Which I get every time but in the end glad I brought it out. You dont even have to have the lights on. Light a few candles. That way its dark but you can still see each other.