[Little Jay]

Hello lovelies,

I'm feeling really down today. I came off of my antidepressants just over half a year ago when we decided to start trying for a baby. I've been on them on and off for 5, nearly 6 years since I was 14/15, and having to face the possibility that I might never leave my depression completely behind. Now it's been 6 months and I've been doing really well, but I'm getting so down that I'm not pregnant yet, and at 20 I thought I'd be at my best health and that it would happen really quickly. I get so upset about it, and I know that it can take time I just can't help it when another month has passed and nothing.

I'm trying so hard not to let it trigger me back into depression, because if I get depressed again my partner will say that I'm not ready for a baby and there is nothing in the world I have wanted more. I just don't understand why it hasn't happened yet, and now I'm getting paranoid that there's something wrong with me - what if we are one of those couples who goes years and years and it never happens.

I know that me getting so upset about it can't be helping, and that realistically it's still not been that long but to me it feels like forever and it upsets me more every time. I hear of people getting pregnant by accident, and here I am after over half a year and nothing has happened. I feel like my partner is being put off of trying because he doesn't want me to get upset about it, and it's taking all the fun and happiness out of it. This was supposed to be a happy and exciting experience but now it's just turned miserable and anxious all the time.

How long did it take any of you to conceive and did any of you feel this way? Is it really normal for it to take this long?

J x

[kaliope]

some people conceive right away and others can take years. it depends on the person. if you are concerned about it, go get checked out by your dr. i know if you have been on the pill for years, that can impact your ability to conceive right away too.

[Fuzzybear]

[technigal]

I found that as soon as I started checking my cervical mucus I got pregnant right away (after years of trying). Are you temp charting or anything? The best tracking website is Ovulation Calendar and Ovulation Chart - Fertility Charting There is a lot of good information on that site.

Good luck.

[hamster-bamster]

LJ,

In the past, before the advent of reproductive tech, couples who could not conceive would give up trying, adopt, and then, miraculously, conceive without further ado. The explanation was psychological - once they released their expectation, the little miracle happened right away. You have yourself said all the right things, how the worry cannot be helping and how the fun is being taken out of the whole deal.

Also, somewhere, a long time ago, I read that the peak female reproductive capacity happens at 25 and not at 20. Another thing is that if your menarche was late, your reproductive system might still be maturing. When did you have menarche?

[Pikku Myy]

Snuggles Little Jay

It is so difficult to tell anyone to try and relax when trying to conceive a baby And the anxiety of not getting preggo immediately is causing you to feel sad. I felt the same way long time ago (lol) Once I kind of gave up hope at age 30 and started thinking about other options, whola - it happened. Try not stress over this too much and most definitely do not get depressed. Again, enjoy the process Your silly friend.

[gayleggg]

Don't be down. It took me over a year to get pregnant back in the day. I know people that it even took longer. Don't give up. I admire you for getting off the meds to try to get pregnant. I was lucky my depression didn't set in until my daughter was 8, so I didn't have to take anything until then. I did finally have to accept the fact that I would need medication for the rest of my life and that was hard for me and took a while to come to that realization. Hang in there.

[hexacoda]

Crossing my fingers for you!